


Ultraviolence

by TrulyRomantic



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, Assassins & Hitmen, Dermatillomania, Film noire inspired, Hitman!AU, I think it's kind of interesting so I hope you do too?, Iwa-chan being a perfect but oblivious boyfriend, M/M, Murder, Oikawa being so in love but also a complete nutcase, Organized Crime, Policeman!AU, Psychopath!AU, Romance, Serial Killer, Slow-ish build?, hitman - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-30
Updated: 2016-02-06
Packaged: 2018-04-01 23:16:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 21,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4038310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TrulyRomantic/pseuds/TrulyRomantic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"It's a little romantic don't you think?<br/>In a way we're star crossed lovers.<br/>You being part of a better, more innocent world. And me being part of the that world's shadow.<br/><br/>AU where Oikawa is a serial killer/hitman and his boyfriend is the local chief police officer.<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. PSYCHOPATH

**Author's Note:**

> This AU is a bit dark and a bit twisted, but I think that keeps things interesting :-)  
> This chapter is just the tip of an iceberg, I already have a multi-chap storyline in mind, lots more character development.

Oikawa Tooru is a hitman.

He will gladly end the life any poor soul unlucky enough to have a price mark on their head. 

Now, it's nothing personal. It's just a job.  
And like most upstanding citizens, Oikawa Tooru is very devoted to his career.

  
Oikawa thinks hitmen have a bad reputation. Being a paid murderer doesn't make someone equal to a psychopathic killer.  
There are many who commit murder and still are hailed as fully functioning citizens, like soldiers, executioners, police officers, politicians, ect, ect. Whether it's the hero of an action movie or a video game we watch mass murders without the blink of an eye, the hero destroys all the bad guys, wiping evil away from a cleaner more innocent world. It's heroic, it's necessary, it's inevitable.

  
Being a serial killer doesn't make you a psychopath.

  
"You're kitchen is so messy." He mumbles to his client.

He wipes off the counter and tucks some utensils into their rightful little holders, the decor is tasteful, pretty white marble counter to compliment the pastel blue cupboards.

Being a trained killer means being meticulous, careful. He despised a mess. He adored tidiness and clean aesthetic.  
He picks up some shattered glass on the floor and tosses it in a waste bin careful not to knick his gloved fingers.

  
"Want some water?"  
The body that was tied up could only wriggle and writhe in response. He's not sure if that wriggle meant yes or was just another futile attempt to escape their inevitable death.  
"I guess not." He smirked at the screaming captive. Or at least they were trying to scream, if not for the gag in their mouth.  
He tilts his head toward them and puts a hand to his ear as if trying to make out the sounds between the muffled cries.

  
"What's that? Oh you're right, I missed a spot."

  
     He continued dutifully cleaning up the kitchen, it was the least he could do, he felt rude for causing such a mess on his first visit. But honestly it was their fault for resisting so much and for trying to make a grab for their knives. In the end they had only shed their own blood in the midst of the wrestling. Silly, that's why people should be more careful with sharp objects. He had cut himself and nicked Oikawa. Not before their flailing limbs has knocked over all the pans and spatulas in the tidy kitchen.  
He had almost missed a spot of blood which had spilled on the counter.

  
He glanced over the body who was glaring at him in what was impressive fear and respite.  
"Sorry, for making you wait so long," He speaks softly and slowly as if comforting a child, "I'm ready for you now."

  
Now it's important to mention that not all hitmen are psychopaths, but Oikawa Tooru is definitely a psychopath.  
....

He regards the corpse with a smile of satisfaction. Another job well done.  
He looks to his watch, 'looks like Iwa-chan is going to be late to our date again.'

  
\---

"Is Oikawa-san done?"

The blonde makes a face pinched with disgust, "Yes."

     Oikawa was notorious in the company, everyone found the way he fulfilled his missions disgusting. There was something wrong about it, the unnerving calm, the obsessive precision, the gleam in his eyes that revealed he was enjoying his job far too much. It was disturbing to say the least to his coworkers. They all did the same work but none of them enjoyed it like Oikawa did. He treated it like it was all a big game, he was playing with his victims. It was easy to see that murdering gave him some sort of high.  
Kageyama was notorious among the assassins but he seemed like Mother Teresa compared to Oikawa.

  
     Kageyama was a different kind of disturbing, it was his disturbing precision and natural talent. It was almost as if he was made to kill. He was a genius, a protege of killing.  
Whether it was hand to hand combat or sniping he was able to complete each mission with ease. He was a perfectionist and it disgusted Tsukishima the way he knew exactly how his targets would move, how he seemed to have to some sort of unholy intuition for violence.

  
There was something inhuman about both of them, Kageyama with his stoic face which never seemed to feel or think of anything but blood. Oikawa with his perpetual grin and constant cheerful teasing and jokes, he could only imagine the sick sadistic mind behind that facade.

  
     Tsukishima hated them both, and already knew they shared the same sentiment. Oikawa with a habit of sabotaging his jobs and friendly threats. He remembers his mission to off some Brazilian politician and when he arrived he found out that they had already been tipped of an assassin making his mission that much more complex. By the time he was able to strangle the stupid old man they had dipped deep into the funds and limited time line, it was humiliating loss of profit and resources. He remembers as he dropped the crumpled corpse into his plush couch he caught sight of a little note. ‘Hope it wasn’t too much to handle.’ Oikawa Tooru

  
How?

  
He didn’t want to think about the dangerously clever the mind of Oikawa was. He didn’t want to think about he had specifically intervened to give him grief, he had singled him out and had malicious intention toward him. He had risked his life, and for what, amusement?

  
He hated Kageyama but knew he didn't have enough humanity in him to even be petty so he didn't worry about him. Plus they were assigned to the same company so they would just have interact civilly.

  
He glances at the raven-haired coworker and is a little surprised to actually see him looking a bit nervous.

  
"What?" He asks forgetting to put as much hostility in his voice as he would have preferred.  
"Something about Oikawa's missions unnerves me."  
Tsukishima just laughs, "How stupid, it's too late to try acting human now."

\-----

     Iwaizumi is getting ready for a date when he's called back to the line of action. He grimaces, he's going to have to cancel on Oikawa, again. It's not that he's really worried whether he'll be forgiven or not, Oikawa has always been very supportive and understanding of his career, deep down. But he knows that he'll probably whine about it for days and that to make up for it he'll probably have to live through another crappy alien documentary marathon.

  
As soon as he ends his call with the nearly hyperventilating Kindaichi who he has tried his best to assure, he calls up his boyfriend who, as always, picks up alarmingly fast.

"Yes Iwa-chan?"  
"God, that's so creepy. How do you always know I'm calling?"  
"I'm a psychic,” He could practically hear his eyes rolling, “ you know phone now in days have caller ID."  
"Yes, but normally it takes people a moment to fumble for their phone and then they answer."  
"It's our telepathy, I always know when my Iwa-chan needs me."  
"Gross."

  
"You wound me." He replies in mock offense, he imagine on the other side Oikawa was also dramatically holding his hand to his heart. (he was) "So why did Iwa-chan call beside to hurt my feelings?"  
"Unfortunately that's all I called for- I can't make it to dinner, there's something urgent at the office."  
"Another murder?" He hummed sympathetically.

"Yes actually." He felt a sigh rumble out, what the heck is wrong with the world?

This was the third mortem case he was on this month. Which wasn't really too surpising as the crime rates were staggering in the city but the usual perps were gang fights, drug abuse, drunk drivers or acts of passion.

  
These last cases were disturbing to say the least, they were something more out of a horror movie. It was easy to see that that in all the cases the murder was carefully premeditated with frightening attention to detail.

  
From what he heard on the phone with Kindachi, this case was the same.

  
"Well, good luck then officer, go beat up some baddies."  
"Yeah, thanks" He smiled.

  
"Hey,..."Oikawa blinked at the long pause on the other line. "Be careful out there alright? There's some crazy people out there and I don't you to be another case."  
"You worry too much Iwa-chan." His voice was soft, fond.  
"Where are you right now?" Oikawa could hear some ruffling in the background, it was most likely Iwa-chan getting together all his stuff to head out on the job.  
"Walking back from work." He replies nonchalantly.

  
"Well, I'm heading out now, I'm locking the door so I hope you remembered your key."  
"Of course Iwa-chan. You be safe too, you'll have to make this up to me so live long enough to take me to the latest Marvel movie."  
"As always you have the worst taste in movies."  
"We can't all love Romcoms as much you do Iwa-chan."  
"I do not watch Romantic Comedies."  
"Mhm" He hummed pleased with himself, he will never let Iwa-chan live down that time he caught him watching love actually with his sister.  
"I gotta go,"  
"Bye."

  
      Oikawa stuffed his phone away in his pocket. He strolled down the alley with a bounce in his step. There was a chill in the air that felt nice running through his sweat soaked hair. The moonlight danced on the puddles in the ashy black asphalt. He listened to the singing of sirens from the police cars racing to the building a couple blocks down. The sound reminds him of his officer boyfriend and his caring words, "Be careful."

  
Iwa-chan really was too sweet Oikawa found himself smiling as he walked down the dirty streets. Finding it ironic how he was on his way to the room that Oikawa had just left.


	2. Star-Crossed Lovers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love that was never meant to be and love that never should be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long!! Somehow I got stuck on the second chapter trying to figure out how I wanted to get into things, luckily I have quite a bit of the next chapter ready so I hope you enjoy this one and keep reading :D

  
“Iwaizumi-san!”  
“Hey.”  
He nods to him looking exhausted, his legs would never admit to shaking but they were close.  
Kindaichi feels his own body ache but knows that Iwaizumi probably has the worst of it. The brunt of the stress of this case is laid upon his shoulders as the chief officer.

  
“Want a coffee?”  
“Yeah, that would be good, thanks.”  
He watches the hot splashes of the deep brown liquid. He hands off a cup to his superior and starts himself one, pouring some cream into his cup liberally.  
This elicits a small laugh from his senior. “You drink it like Oikawa does. Lots of cream.”  
“It’s too bitter on it’s own.”  
“He says that too.” Iwaizumi’s wearing that small smile that slips out when he’s feeling good.

  
      Something flutters in Kindaichi’s stomach as he sees the gesture, it’s always like this, this little flood of an indescribable feeling whenever he’s able to please his senior. But beneath the wash of happiness there’s a sinking in his gut, mixed in with the sugar and cream is the deep notes of bitterness. And he can taste it, the sadness. Because the closest he can come to making Iwaizumi happy is to remind him of his boyfriend Oikawa Tooru.

The smile is never meant for him but the man he could never compete with. And beneath all of his shame and understanding is the most shameless, irrational feeling of all, jealousy. He shouldn’t be jealous. He doesn’t have a right. Iwaizumi Hajime never belonged to him, he didn’t have any right over his happiness or his love.  
But he really wished he did.

  
He wished it was not Oikawa Tooru but him.  
And that was the most gut wrenching feeling in the world because it was the feeling of utter hopelessness.

  
Iwaizumi sinks down into a chair and rolls back his head, eyes closed almost looking like he’s in prayer. The truth is most of the officers don’t really see Iwaizumi this relaxed or rather this vulnerable. And Kindaichi guesses that this is what he has to show for pining after this man since highschool.

  
He tries not to appreciate the smooth chiseled lines of Iwaizumi’s face, the way the light bring out the shadows in his face that makes him seem so much more like the greek sculpture of an adonis he was.

  
He really tries not to.  
Kunimi comes in before he can oogle much longer, which he silently thanks him and curses him for.

  
“Iwaizumi-san.”  
“Hey Kunimi.”  
He offers him an unimpressed glare, something that Kindaichi still doesn’t understand how he has the courage to do.  
“Iwaizumi-san, you are exhausted, it’s time for you to go home.”  
“Well-”  
“No excuses, Saeko-san told me to tell this to you.”

  
Iwaizumi looks thoughtful but reluctant.  
“I-it’s really fine, we can continue from here.” Kindaichi finds himself saying without really realizing it. And somehow that softens Iwaizumi’s expression, something that doesn’t go unnoticed by either of the juniors and makes Kindaichi dangerously close to blushing like a school girl.

  
“Getting lectured from my juniors, I guess I really must be losing my touch.” He smiles that comforting smile he uses whenever talking to his nervous rookies or his frightened civilians. And its never as condescending as its reassuring.

  
Iwaizumi walks out leaving Kindaichi to watch his back like he always does. Iwaizumi on his way to see his love and with him left behind.

  
\----  
When Iwaizumi comes back he hears the shower running.  
A deep exhale racks through his exhausted joints.

  
He meanders through the dark room and yanks off what he now felt was suffocating clothing. He stretches his arms and ruffles through his sweat soaked hair.  
He leans against the door frame, the wood feels cool and slightly wet from the humid room.

  
"Hey Oikawa."  
"Mmmm.." He humms softly, his voice melting into the steam floating away from the hot water.  
Iwaizumi pushes the curtain aside and steps into the porcelain lined shower. He wraps his arms around his boyfriend who leans into him with a pleased sigh.  
"How was work?" He mumbled between kisses along pale shoulders.  
"Exhausting, this client was very....resistant."  
"He wasn't interested in what your company was selling?"

  
"It took some haggling but I was able to convince him." He finished with a trademark little smirk of satisfaction.  
"hmmmm..." He nipped at Oikawa's ear, enjoying the soft whimper it elicited.  
"How about you?" He inquires, voice a little too smooth and soft.  
"Hm?"

  
He spins around, earthy brown brown eyes meeting his, noses brushing. Iwaizumi adjusts his hands around Oikawa's slim waist.  
"Catch any bad guys?" Oikawa breathes, long lashes fluttering in synch with the soft huffs, elegant fingers intertwined behind Iwaizumi's neck.  
"No." He sighs deeply. Oikawa can see the genuine disappointment in those steely eyes. It's only natural, when it comes to protecting and serving Iwaizumi is the real deal. He knew that every case deeply affected him, because unlike Oikawa, Iwaizumi felt for people. He was empathetic to the point of miserable.  
"Sounds frustrating." Oikawa practically purred.

  
"Yeah." He closed his eyes and let his boyfriend pepper kisses over his lids.  
"Maybe you need to relax." The dare in his tone was apparent.

  
"Yeah." He managed to reply before Oikawa's tongue lapped against his. Their kisses were heated and deep. He felt his thoughts float away like the steam, swirling around them, sticking to their skin in the sweet wet heat.

Rough fingers pressing them closer, his muscles ached and yet they seemed to only relax the tighter he held on. He can feel the drum of deep breaths against his shoulder, the press of his delicate nose into the crook of his neck, of soft lips tracing his skin.

The world is hot and foggy, white and soft like clouds and fair skin pressed against ivory tiles.

  
\----

It's a little romantic don't you think?  
In a way we're star crossed lovers.

  
You being part of a better, more innocent world. And me being part of the that world's shadow.  
And yet here we are together, your ignorant bliss and my gratifying deceit.

  
And when we're here under the shade of the night, illuminated by the pouring moonlight, we exist in this perfect twilight for you and me.  
You darkness being your desire for me, and my light being my love for you.

  
“Oikawa,” He says softly, his voice rough and throaty. Hajime's strong hands grasping the curve of his hips, thumb rubbing against the dip of his bone, arms pulling him into a gratifying grind.

  
'I want to lean in for a kiss, I want to caress my lips against every inch of toned shoulder and collar and chest you leave exposed. He looks so good like this it should be illegal for him to wear a shirt, or anything. There isn’t any music playing but there’s the beat of my heart and your breaths sound like a melody.

Midsummer night, the window’s open and a breeze brings a shiver to our skin, I can feel the tremble of your skin like the vibrato of a cello, as fingers drag like the bow on strings, playing soft and sweet sounds. It makes the air deep and heavy as we huff out hot breathes between our brushing faces. It’s an amazing symphony and the whole world feels in sync.

  
It’s like the moon is swinging, the winds are singing, the clouds are dancing, and you’re just so bright, you’re brilliant like a star. It makes my eyes burn, my breath hitch, pulls at something deep inside my chest. I love, I want you, I need you.

And it feels great, it feels good, it’s nice loving you. I could do it forever honestly.  
I feel your lips brush against my cheeks, it’s like star dust powdering my skin, sparkling and colorful, you’re the colors of all the sky, the planets and stellar specks of light. It’s something hard to grasp, but easy to see; full of wonder and radiance.

  
I just want you to touch me, cover me in glitter.'  
I looked down at his face, chest heaving, body aching. He stared back up, eyes glowing.  
“You’re so beautiful.”  
I know, I know I’m pretty. I’m your sky, your moon, your light. I’m your everything.

  
\---

  
The morning light is soft and warm, in actuality, but for Tooru it seems like the sun is hellish ball of impudent brightness on his blurry eyes.  
"Fuuck I hate mornings...."  
He glares at the sun with offense that is all too personal.  
He feels a chuckle against his neck and it tickles him a bit.

  
One deep breath in, one exhale out, the air bristles through his boyfriend's dark hair. With one last ruffle of disheveled locks he starts to get up to the reluctance of Iwaizumi who groans at the loss of warmth.

  
He's done brushing his teeth by the time Iwaizumi finally decides to drag out of bed.  
He stumbles about unaware he looks like a walking Greek god, half naked in the morning light, he's all chiseled muscle and sun kissed skin.  
He walks into their kitchen, their kitchen, he loves the sound of that.

It's something that still seems magical, Iwaizumi hajime lives with me. He loves me, he's my boyfriend, he's mine, all mine. He's everything I ever wanted and more.

  
"Iwa-chan coffee?"  
"Sure, thanks."  
He's picking up their clothes from where they were tossed aside the night before.  
"Hey, is this blood?"  
"Hm?" Oikawa peered over to the shirt in Iwa-chan's hand. It was stained in the blood of the man he murdered last night. It wasn't too big of a blot but it was definitely going to take some bleach.

  
"Nah that's just some cranberry juice Iwa-chan."  
"Still don't understand how you can drink that gross stuff."  
"Not all of us can run on black coffee."

  
He poured himself a glass of the red liquid for breakfast.

  
"It makes me feel like Nosferatu, it's actually the blood of virgins." He raised his glass dramatically.  
"Creep" Iwaizumi grinned. And Oikawa grinned because he loved to see Iwaizumi pleased with him.

  
“Hey, Iwa-chan when’s your next day off?” Oikawa drapes over him lazily, resting his chin on Iwaizumi’s shoulders.  
He sips thoughtfully, “Saturday.”  
“So in 2 days?”  
“Yup.” He plopped onto their cushy sofa.  
“I guess the great Oikawa Tooru will have to deign you the honor of his company.” He sung while situating himself on Iwa-chan’s lap.  
“Thanks Shittykawa.”

  
“Iwa-chan, so ungracious. Where did you learn your manners.”  
“Definitely from somewhere better than yours.”  
Oikawa was thinking of something snarky to return back but became distracted by ticklish kisses on his neck.  
“wai-waiit, Iwa-chan” He whines between giggles.

  
Oikawa leans back into his arms and he hugs him close and breathes deeply, there probably not a more peaceful moment in the world.

  
"Well, I got to go." Iwa-chan disentangles himself from Oikawa, not with out a gentle stroke through his hair first.  
"Hmm, me too." Tooru said much less spirited than usual, which was rare because he was always super whiny about going to work.  
"Tough client?"  
"No, it's just this project includes me working with the two most annoying colleagues."  
"Sounds rough."  
"The great Oikawa will manage."  
"Alright, see you." He gives a quick peck to Oikawa's cheek before heading out.  
He smiles for his love and waves him off.  
"Well, better get ready for my job."

  
He smirks and grabs a duffel he prepared while Iwa-chan was at work yesterday. He hopes he remembered all the surgical tools necessary.  
\---

  
“Kageyama.” His voice was smooth, breathing even. His eyes were flat, long lashes curtaining his chocolate irises as they peered down.  
“Pass me the scalpel.”  
Tobio nods and hands the blade over to Oikawa’s long fingers. His hands are steady and his movements precise. He picks the right spot to plunge and he pulls the blade against the skin, tension tearing through flesh cleanly. His face is smooth and focused.

  
It’s one of those rare moments where he isn’t laughing or making obnoxious jokes. Kageyama understands why he acts so jocular all the time, it’s a facade to mask the intensity of the person that was Oikawa Tooru. Intense was an understatement of the word, whenever he got serious the tension in the room was tangible, like walking through water rather than air.

  
He watched them, brown eyes liquidy and boiling, eyeing the metallic red spilling over the table and squirting his gloved hands.

  
“Bag.” Obediently he hands them the container.  
If Oikawa was anything he was dexterous, with ginger touch he pulled the organ and slipped it into the bag.  
“Organ repossessed.” He let a small dark smile fall on his still smooth face, eyes half lidded, brown eyes shining from the concentration.  
Kageyama doesn’t realize that he’s been staring.

  
“You guys done butchering that thug?” A passively annoyed voice chimes in, none other than Tsukishima.  
“Of course, no thanks to blondie though.”  
Tsukishima shrugs, “If I had that much medical knowledge then I don’t think I’d be here killing people.”  
Oikawa looks like he wants to say something but they’re all interrupted by the sound of shots.  
“Shit.” Tsukishima helpfully adds.

  
Two more guards storm in grievously unaware that their actions will inevitably doom them.  
He rushes one of them, knocking them back to hallway. Kageyama heads over to the next one but a hand pulls him back.

  
“Tobio-chan, go get the other guard.” He tilts his head towards the left behind them. And as if summoned, another guard magically appeared at the doorway just at that moment.

  
Kageyama is quick to change his target, there’s the soft sound of scuffing friction on the floor as his feet dig into the ground, he sprints full speed with the lunge of a predator. There was no hope for the guard, to Kageyama, his moves are slow, disoriented, his foot work appalling.

Fighting is like a dance, all careful steps and fluid movement, and does Kageyama love to lead. He sets the pace, he calls the beat, and he wants it fast, rhythmic, running like an adrenaline laced heart beat. It’s his style, even in highschool when he played volley ball, he liked to control the court, the setter controls the tempo of all the spikes and no one can keep up with his tempo.

Fighting was so much emancipating than sports though, because now he didn’t have to slow down for the lethargic team mates, he could force his opponent into the rhythm of his dance with the force of his fists.

  
He’s barely gotten to play at all when his opponent falls and is surreptitiously pinned down.  
He’s strangling his victim with a wire he’s brought, it gives the opportunity to look at his surroundings. He watches slightly mystified as Oikawa takes down the remaining guard.

  
He walks toward the gunmen. Fucking walking.

  
His eyes are level, expression flat as the light moves shadows on the delicate features of his face. His hips rock as he shifts his weight from one foot to the other, his walk brisk but perfectly centered. The gunmen shoots but he moves from it as if it was just child’s play, a kid squirting a water gun. His eyes flickers for less than a moment and...

  
Suddenly he lunges, hands on throat in seconds, knee deep into the man’s gut.  
The gun falls with a loud clank followed by the sound of soft gasps for life.

  
His feet dangling, the dim flickering light in the small room shining directly on the dying man’s expression, his struggling body shadowing his killer.  
Kageyama forgets he was strangling someone as well and when he looks down he’s relieved they are indeed dead.  
There’s a moment of quiet as both of them regard their corpses.

  
Oikawa is the first to move towards the hallway, Kageyama follows.

  
There they find Tsukishima, he’s sporting a new gash along his arm. Struggling, he’s holding down the guard. His position is improper, if he shifted his weight to his legs he could have a much more stable restrainment, Kageyama notes and is sure that Oikawa notices as well.

  
After several awkward moments they watch Tsukishima brutishly beat and choke his victim, his death more a result of blunt force rather than calculated procedure.  
“Tsukishima….” Oikawa’s tone is unsatisfied yet his voice remains as fluid and firm as ever, “That was sloppy.”

  
“I don’t recall you ever being my senpai.” He bites back.  
Oikawa’s gaze sharpens before he redirects his attention back to Kageyama.  
“Hey, Tobio-chan, kill Tsukishima.” His eyes are so confident and his tone is almost velvety, like he had just asked Kageyama to go on a date instead of murdering his colleague.

  
“What?” And yet his hand tightens slightly on his holster. It’s so deeply ingrained for him to follow orders that it’s lucky he thought to question at least this time around.  
“I had to try.” He smirks pleased.

  
If Tsukishima was hiding his relief he was quite good at hiding it. He merely glares at them before dragging himself up and stalking off.  
Kageyama is left standing beside Oikawa until he realizes he doesn’t really have any reason to be.

  
The brunette turns to him with a grin, “Well, see you Tobio-chan. I’m off for a date.” He looks far too frivolous for a man who just choked the life out of a man.  
“Maybe we’ll work together again.” He pauses, “ You seem to like following my orders.”  
Kageyama opens up his mouth but no sound comes out, it’s true he’s always treated Oikawa as his senior, as his boss but it wasn’t really necessary in the Hitmen industry there wasn’t real ranks.

  
Oikawa looks bemused, “You’re a good kid.”  
Kageyama is left alone before he realizes he was supposed to report to his company with Tsukishima.

  
\---  
“So how did it go?” Their superior inquires right as they enter the office.

  
With a bored expression Tsukishima starts, “We infiltrated the home of Ichiya Hirazawa, we killed the guards in the front, we then proceeded to forcefully drug Hirazawa and remove the indebted organ, 3 more guards appeared and were also terminated. The repossessed organ is in the cooler in the vehicle.”  
“Where is Oikawa?”  
“Left early for a date.” Tsukishima grits out.

  
“Alright, good job, the money has already been added to your bank accounts.”  
Tsukishima mumbles something that sounds like a spiritless ‘thanks’ and heads out the room, leaving Kageyama to chase behind him.  
Candidly speaking Kageyama doesn’t like Tsukishima at all. But he’s been here longer and would know more about Oikawa Tooru. And it’s prudent to be informed on all hitmen in your vicinity.

  
So that’s why he walks with Tsukishima through the corridor to the exit, which elicits a very unpleasant face from Tsukishima because he’s well, an asshole.  
Kageyama isn’t exactly the best conversationalist so straight to the point would be best, “About Oikawa Tooru…..”  
“Why?” Is Tsukishima’s immediate response which throws Kageyama off guard because he didn’t rehearse this far.  
“C-curious, you guys seem to not get along so I figured you know him.”

  
Tsukishima rolls his eyes, “He definitely doesn’t like me…” then he pauses with a smirk, “But I wonder why he hates you so much.” smirk directed towards Kageyama.  
Tobio blinks owlishly he didn’t think this would be turned back on him and he doesn’t quite understand where Tsukishima got that from.  
“What?” Kageyama inquires sounding more defensive than he wanted to.

  
“Try not to think about it too hard King.” He laughs as he heads off a different hallway, “If worst comes to worst, just kill each other.”  
“Fuck off Tsukishima.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah Tsukki, fuck off. -- Thankyou so much everyone who’s reading. I really hope you enjoyed this chapter or at least found it engaging. There’s a bit more romance in this one and I hope it came out okay, the writing process for me is just pretty much me doubting every sentence I write so other people’s feedback is super important to me. I also hope you liked the more actiony scenes. There’s more coming up, next chapter there should be some more romance, some more murder, and with any luck maybe some new characters or backstory. I’m so ready to get into Tsukishima’s backstory. Still more planned for Tobio in the main storyline. Feedback is super appreciated, I don’t bite and if you’re interested in any particular element of the story, I’ll prioritize it lol


	3. Transfer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He walks up to a window overlooking the city feeling strangely sentimental over a view he usually optimized for sniping.  
> Today was the day. He got dressed up quickly. And headed to the police station. He had a contract to fulfill for a certain hitman sponsor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ones a bit more Kageyama centric, hinting a bit at his backstory and developing some more of the main plotline :3  
> Oh yeah and introducing some more of the police in this police/hitmen AU :D  
> I honestly can't wait to get into everyone's back stories, but alas I want to keep the plot moving. This is a bit dialogue heavy I think.

“Kageyama!”

  
What was that noise.

  
His eyes peeled open. There was red, red everywhere. Scarlet water, crimson air, he was drowning in it, his whole head buzzing.  
He reaches to rub his eyes but hisses from a jolt of pain.

  
Gracelessly he tries his other hand and smears out some of the metallic vermillion.  
He blinks away some more blood and wipes his face, a ruffle of hair with his fingers reveals his head is bleeding which explains the blood in his eyes.  
The room starts to formulate in his vision, it’s dark, grey….empty.

  
They left him…..

  
“That bastard….what was it?” Shit. It hurt to think of names.  
He remembers the arm wound, carefully he grabs the appendage and nurses it in his hold.

  
It’s time to run.

  
He knew someone was coming, police or more criminals, he didn’t particularly want to be involved with either of them. He drags himself up, legs slacking, breath hitched deep in his throat. Everything is metal, the air is metal, like daggers piercing his lungs. It hurts everywhere, but it doesn’t matter, it’s time to move.

He hears himself hiss and howl in pain like an animal. He felt like an animal, like a rabid creature, diseased of the mind. An injured animal in a corner struggling to survive, nothing left but the primitive need to fight, to fear, to live.

Was this his life, killing to live and living to kill? Like some depraved soul, existing for the hunt? Mind numbing murder after murder, he watches live’s fly away like balloons in the sky.

All of them the same color, red, like blood, like life. The sky isn’t blue but grey, and the vivid red balloons glide through the breeze of an achromatic heaven. He watches them fly far away and slightly envies them. If only he could fly too. If only he could float away to peace too.

If only he could die too.  
\---

  
His eyes blearily open, the hazy vision caused not by blood loss but sleepiness.  
He blinks and finds himself in his room.

  
Alone.  
Like always.

  
He runs his fingers through his hair, it’s wet with cold sweat, body still chilled from his dreams.  
With great reluctance he pulls himself from the sheets and the soles of his feet land on plush carpet. The room is comfortable, if not austere. But that’s how he likes it, simple, clean, no clutter or personality.

  
He turns on the radio near his bed, it’s useful to hear news report. But today he tuned it into some station playing some old sounding melodies. He doesn’t usually listen to music, but sometimes he needs the background sound, to drown out the silence. It makes everything feel a little less….empty.

  
He walks up to a window overlooking the city feeling strangely sentimental over a view he usually optimized for sniping.  
The sunrise blushes the city with a soft red and gold hue, the rest of the sky still a chilly blue.

  
Today was the day. He got dressed up quickly. And headed to the police station. He had a contract to fulfill for a certain hitman sponsor.

  
\----  
The job’s concept was quite simple. Become an officer in the local police force. Apparently they needed inside eyes, someone to remove evidence, give warnings. They had someone else doing this job before but it seems like they’ve gone ghost, under the radar of the crime syndicate completely. With their mole gone, they needed a new source. Kageyama got the mission easily.

  
Now the tricky part was making sure the actual police force would accept him.  
Kageyama had to admit, his social skills were….lacking.

 

He liked to think of himself as a soloist, he marched to his own beat and other people just threw him out of rhythm. The idea of working as a team with other people was intimidating. He had a notably bad record of working with others, after the ‘incident’, he’s not sure if he can really grasp the idea of trusting others….

  
"What are looking at?" A little orange ball of fuzz asks.  
"Huh?"  
Kageyama realizes he's been standing at the entrance of the department staring into nothingness.  
"You look really suspicious.” The little midget gives him a scrutinizing stare.  
“What the hell? Why?”  
“You have this really scary face like you’re going to kill someone.”

  
Well it’s not exactly inaccurate but it still irks Kageyama because he doesn’t know that.  
‘Concentrate Tobio, you have to work well with other people. Don’t murder the ginger midget on the first day of the job.’

  
He goes on, “You look like you’re a criminal or something, maybe you should turn yourself in.”  
Kageyama would like to think that he is a pretty patient person after dealing with Tsukishima for years. So being the bigger man he tries to give a disarming smile, “I’m not a criminal, I’m here to apply for a position.”

  
“Wahh!!!! Your smile is super scary!!” He recoils in genuine fear which pisses off Kageyama even further.  
“Shut up!! What is a little kid doing here anyway?!”  
“I’m not a little kid, I’m an officer!”  
“What the hell, no way a dumbass like you is a cop.”  
“What the hell, I have a badge, and I’m not a dumbass who can’t walk through the front door!”  
“First off, I’m nervous! And as for your badge I don’t believe you!”

  
He promptly flips out a badge which he has to stretch out his arm to bring to eye level to Kageyama.  
“Hinata Shouyou…” He reads it with a faint tinge of nostalgia, something about the name is familiar.  
“Yup, don’t wear it out.” Hinata smiles smugly.

  
“I can’t believe such a dumbass is a cop.” He blinks down at the little tangerine.  
“Excuse you, if you’re applying then I’m your sempai.”  
“No way. You look like 12. How old are you even?”  
“24….you?”  
“24.”  
“When’s your birthday?” Studying him seriously.  
“December 22."  
“Hah! I’m older than you, mine's June 22." Hinata smirks like he just won the lottery.

  
Kageyama glares at him and considers how bad impression it would leave on the rest of the force if he threw one of their officers out a window.  
“What’s this?” A gentle voice chimes in.  
“This scary guy is going to apply.”He motions to Kageyama.  
“I’m not scary!”

  
     Kageyama snaps to attention to look at the other officer and immediately gives a short bow, “Please to meet you, I hope we can work together.”  
The orange shorty is trying to hold back a snort as he looks at Kageyama being formal.

  
“Woah, it’s a pleasure to meet you too.” He waves off the bow and holds out a hand, “I’m Sugawara Koushi, I take it you mean to apply for our opening spot?”  
Kageyama takes the handshake and tries to not to flush under the radiant smile the silver hair officer is emanating.  
“Well let’s get inside and talk to Daichi.”

  
The little ginger follows in with them, giving Kageyama a copious amount of glances.  
“What is it dumbass?” He whispers as if not to give a bad impression to the more mature sempai walking in front of him.  
“Nothing, just looking at your scary face, are you sure you’re not a criminal?”

  
“Yes.” He glares. It’s actually a lie but no one here needs to know that. He’s not sure if Hinata is just an idiot or if he actually has a good instinct for people since he technically is right on the mark. Either way it’s pissing off Kageyama, he doesn’t need anyone being suspicious of him.  
Kageyama decides to ignore him for now focusing on the back of the sempai leading them to one of the higher ups. He doesn’t notice the extra peers from Hinata, nor the slight tinge of pink on his cheeks.

  
They get to an office where Kageyama is confronted by a very professional looking man, it’s almost as if he was born an officer with broad shoulders and a straight honest looking face.  
“Here he is.”  
“Kageyama Tobio?”  
“Yes.”

  
He gives a deep bow which Sawamura, like Sugawara, waves off in favor of a handshake.  
His hand has a sturdy grip which matches the rest of his appearance, reliable, firm.

  
“Please to meet you Sawamura-san.”  
“You as well, but if you don’t mind, just call me Daichi.” He replies easily.  
Kageyama nods quickly.  
“Now lets go see your skills.”

  
“Go easy on him Daichi-san, he was so nervous he wouldn’t walk through the door.” Hinata chimes in.  
“Shut up,” Kageyama mouths to him angrily.

  
\-----  
Kageyama, simply put, is exceptional.  
He easily passes the series of tests he’s assigned. His marksmanship is alarmingly accurate, his laps are in record time, he’s incredibly fit, and his fighting technique and suppression is flawless.

  
“Welcome to the team.” Daichi smiles with a hardy pat on the back.  
The whole time Hinata, for reasons unknown, decided to watch Kageyama’s assessment, eyes as wide as dinner plates.  
“Wow you’re amazing!” He jumps over to him eyes sparkling.

  
Kageyama’s straight face is malfunctioning, caught between an embarrassed grimace and a genuine smile, “I-I uhm...dumbass.”  
“Who calls someone a dumbass after they compliment you!!” He defends cheeks flushed, Kageyama confusing blush with a flush of anger slightly panics at his own social awkwardness.

  
“Uh-... thanks,” He mumbles eyes suddenly finding the potted plant in the corner of the room fascinating.  
Both Daichi and Sugawara smiled at the scene sensing the blooming of a very odd pair.

  
“When he gets here you can meet Iwaizumi, he’s my superior.”  
“Alright.” Kageyama responds, he would be lying if he wasn’t interested in the man Iwaizumi Hajime, the man who could hold the interest of someone as fickle and enigmatic as Oikawa Tooru.

  
\-----  
“Iwa-chaaaaaann pay attention to me not your phone.”  
“Be quiet Shittykawa it’s from my work.”  
“What someone else get killed?”  
“No-shhh.” He swipes to pick up the call.  
“Iwaizumi Hajime” he answers.

  
“Iwa-chan your professional voice is so sexy, you should talk like that next time we do it-Ow!” He yelps as his forehead is flicked. “So violent, save the aggression for bed.”  
“I swear Trashykawa-!”  
“I prefer Daichi but Trashykawa works too.”  
“Sorry Daichi.” he sighs while fixing a glare on his grinning boyfriend.  
“It’s alright Iwaizumi-san. I just called to tell you we have someone to fill out Kozume’s position.”  
“Alright, I’m on my way over.”  
“Arrest me officer!” Oikawa melodramatically flops onto the bed beside Iwaizumi shifting into his best seductive pose. Hand resting against slim hips, eyes half lid and lips smirking with the biggest shit eating grin.

  
Iwa-chan’s left in one of those moments where he’s not sure if he wants to fight him or fuck him.  
Fortunately or unfortunately he has to go to work now. He flips out of bed and flits on a shirt much to the disappointment of Oikawa.

  
“What was the call for Iwa-chan?”  
“Got a new transfer.”  
“To replace the little pudding head who went missing?”  
“Yup” Iwaizumi faintly thinks he doesn’t remember mentioning Kozume to Oikawa but he could be wrong, it was a pretty big deal so he could have just heard about it on the news. Although when he thinks about that, he also remembers there was surprisingly little News coverage on the missing officer. In fact there was a lot of suspicious things about that case and-  
“Hey Iwa-chan.”  
“Yeah?” complicated thoughts interrupted.  
“Who’s the transfer?”  
“Some kid….named Kageyama Tobio?”

  
Oikawa’s smile falters a bit, flickering with an expression that was unreadable, but in less than a second he reverts to a carefree grin, “good luck at work, Iwa-chan."

\-----  
Daichi hangs up with a tired smile and regards his new rookie.  
“Alright Kageyama for now I just want you to go patrol with Hinata.”  
Kageyama looks down at the little officer with a grimace, he doesn't really expect much.

  
“Don’t look so doubtful, I’ll let you know, I can run and I can jump.” His eyes gleam with passion on the last bit but Kageyama has squeeze the very life out of many eyes so it will take more than that to convince him.  
“Why the hell would you need to run or jump dumbass?”  
“It’s actually super useful Bakageyama!”  
“What did you call me?”  
"Well you two get along, off you go to your post then." Daichi shoves them out, deciding he isn’t paid enough to be an officer and a baby sitter.

  
They shuffle away looking oddly natural together.  
"Buy me some meat buns Kageyama,"  
"Why the hell should I?"  
"Because I'm your sempai." He practically sings.  
"Fine." Kageyama grumbles.

  
\----  
Kageyama finds himself fitting in with Karasuno police force surprisingly well.  
For the most part he spends his days patrolling with Hinata who’s partner he was replacing. Kageyama has found most social interaction to be very similar to teeth wrenching but it’s different with these colleagues. It’s easy.

  
Conversation with the little ginger is effortless, filled mostly with Hinata’s excited chatter, shouting gleefully over even the smallest of events. Kageyama is for the most part, silent, blue eyes intently watching the giddy movements of the boy seemed to be made of pure sunshine. Occasionally he adds a remark, usually Hinata saying something dumb and ridiculous and Kageyama replying to him with something equally simple minded, they’re both idiots to be completely honest. They bicker and fight constantly and yet they’re never really upset when it’s all done. Even in the midst of shouting and rough jabs and pinches, their fights are more competition and play than anything else.

  
“You think this is how they flirt?”  
“Please don’t say that Suga.”  
“C’mon, they’re adorable together.” He adds in a playful whisper motioning to the exhausting pair.

  
Daichi squints at the two not completely understanding what’s adorable about Hinata orbiting around Kageyama all giddy and teasing whilst Kageyama looks as if he’s barely restraining himself from defenestrating him or himself.  
“Uhm, yeah. Cute.”

  
Sugawara grins at Sawamura and he pretends it doesn’t make his heart jump just a little.  
“Say Suga…..” He starts, eyes looking deep and meaningful which catches Sugawara’s attention quickly.  
They’re both interrupted by the Walkie Talkies they carry.  
“Sawamura Daichi.” He answers trying not to sigh.  
“It’s Iwaizumi, I’m going to need your help for this interrogation.”  
“Alright. Be right over.”  
“Thanks.”  
Suga raises his eyebrow and Daichi shrugs, “Apparently he needs me for the interrogation.”

  
\---

  
“They requested that you do it,”  
“I see.”

  
They stand on one side of a double sided mirror dividing the interrogation room with the viewing room.

  
In said interrogation room with his longs legs crossed and his arms folded indignantly is none other the great Oikawa Tooru who tips his head up high as if he owns the entire department. He’s tapping his feet as if to time his periodic schedule of offended huffs.

  
‘This is going to be a long day.’ Daichi mumbles to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been trying to get these out weekly but it always comes out about 10 days lol Sorry about that. On the bright side I have so much of this fic written, on the other hand I feel like this is going to end up pretty big. I really hope you're into multi chap AUs lol because I really want to write it but I'm scared no one wants to read it xD Thanks sooo sooo much to those who Kudos and Comment, it means everything to me. Literally every time I get a new kudos I'm just like "my life has been validated" lol  
> Hope you stick for more chapters.


	4. Interrogation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “...So we’re friends?”  
> “Friends?”  
> “Yes Bakageyama, the F-word.”  
> “Fuck.”  
> “No, Friends!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's this, a new chapter and it hasn't been a week yet? I should be doing my astronomy. Oh well. I have gayer priorities to fulfill. For this chapter we're still sticking around with the police squad. I'm trying to keep make sure I keep IwaOi in every chapter but I love all the other characters and pairings too, my god how am I going to fit everything in. I hope you like this, feel free to tell me if you want me to focus on a certain aspect or think it's going too slow or fast. I can write really wordy long chapters but I'm trying to keep this brief, I'm still wondering if I should have deleted some parts.  
> \--fun story, I posted this and it didn't update the story or show up in search results/listings?? So I deleted and reposted. As to the 3 ppl who found this and kudos prior to that I have no idea how u found chapter 4 but god bless you.

“Oi! Shittykawa you better not be getting worried.”

  
Chocolate brown eyes glazed over in a lazy stare out the car window. Technicolor lights reflecting on his dark irises, the city luminates, bustling with energy of the evening.

  
He always feels a bit guilty about it but he takes one hand off the steering wheel and reaches over to pinch one of those stupidly full cheeks.

Iwaizumi runs a thumb against the delicate curve of his features. Oikawa’s face turns to press into his fingers until he’s cradling his cheek in his palm. His own thin fingers wrap around his wrist.

  
“Hey, it’s going to be fine.” It’s one of those rare moments when his makes his rough low voice soft and gentle, Oikawa feels like it’s his favorite sound in the world.  
“Alright Iwa-chan.” He leans into the gentle touch until the hand pulls away to resume driving.  
“It’s just some questions, and I’ll be right there. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“Yeah...after all, they can’t arrest someone without evidence.”  
“Too bad being annoying isn’t a crime, then we’d finally get you behind bars.”  
“Too bad.” He smiles, finding it ironic how they could joke about his incarceration completely unaware of how much they really should be locking him up.

“Hey Iwa-chan, what if I was guilty of a crime? Then what would you do?”  
“If I knew you were doing something bad, I would stop your dumb ass.”  
It was a very Iwa-chan answer. In any situation Iwaizumi would protect him, even from himself and his own broken mind. ‘If you knew’, he thinks are very important terms.  
\----  
Sawamura’s face, as always, was disturbingly genuine and sympathetic as Iwaizumi briefed him. His naturally kind features were only rivaled by Sugawara who in perspective seemed like a walking angel.

And it wasn’t like Sawamura was pretty or gentle looking, Iwaizumi couldn’t really put his his finger on it until he was in charge of the canine unit training and realized exactly which officer those big brown shepherds reminded him of.

  
He furrowed his even brows, “So your boyfriend is a suspect in the recent murder case.”  
Iwaizumi lets out a heavy sigh with a nod.

  
“Uh, wow, sorry.” He starts with empathetic frown.  
Iwaizumi holds up a hand, to wave him off “Don’t be, just ask him the questions and we’ll see.”  
“Alright.”  
“It’s nothing too incriminating, apparently he was spotted walking from the hotel during the time frame the murder took place. So we have to go through the motions of asking him some questions.”  
“Okay.”  
“I just hope he doesn’t act too much like an idiot during the process.” Iwazumi can already feel another sigh coming on.

Daichi wants to add, well it is Oikawa, but he refrains himself as the chief probably already has enough on his plate.  
“You do handle him the best.” He adds instead with a smile.

  
A rookie saunters in with some coffees for the two respecting officers, that is until he drops the tray at the sight of the man in the interrogation room.  
“Kageyama, you alright?”  
“Y-yes! Sorry about that.”  
His eyes linger a bit more on the mass murderer until he turns around, “I’ll get you some new cups.”  
“Okay, thanks.”

  
Sawamura shrugs to Iwaizumi who’s prioritizing his energy and attention on brooding over his high maintenance boyfriend.  
Sawamura feels a bit awkward being stuck in the middle of such a delicate situation, however Iwaizumi is an understanding guy, beneath an appearingly low temper was a rather rational and level head.

The exact opposite of his charismatic boyfriend who beneath an air of superiority and calm had a temper similar to a ticking time bomb.  
Truth is, interrogating Oikawa was going to be a pain in the ass and it wasn’t even because he was afraid of upsetting Iwaizumi, it’s because Oikawa himself is a pain in the ass.

  
He strolls into the room and drags out a chair, ignoring the way Oikawa looks personally offended at the sound of friction.

  
“So it’s officer thunder thighs, where’s your boyfriend?”  
He could practically hear the moment Iwaizumi’s face went into his palm.  
“Hello to you too Oikawa,”  
He simply scoffs.

  
“Alright, so you were seen leaving the Holly Hotel around 6PM, another person reported seeing you walking in a neighboring street around 6:45PM.”  
“It’s illegal to walk in this city? No wonder no one’s getting enough exercise these days. I thought you would be all about walking given your lumberjack legs.”  
“Oikawa this is not about my albeit muscular legs.”  
“Of course your thigh muscle is probably the result of something besides walking.”  
“Oikawa.” He warns.  
“You’re cute boyfriend would know all about it. The refreshing one, he probably has lots of energy to give your legs…..a work out.”  
“Oikawa this is sexual harassment.”

  
Oikawa looks at him absolutely scandalized, “Ah! Sawamura-san, why, I was talking about volleyball.” He adds in a mocking tone. “You two still practice together after all.”  
Daichi felt himself breaking, he was supposed to break the suspects, not the other way around. He was iron fist Sawamura, doesn’t let up in questioning, his unbending fortitude cracks all the criminals into confessions. That reputation was feeling hollow in the shine of Oikawa’s jeering. He pinches the bridge of his nose and grudgingly continues.

  
“Okay, so what were you doing at the Holly Hotel on Sunday?”  
“I had a client to meet with.”  
“What time.”  
“From 4PM-6PM, it went a bit over-time because he was very reluctant to part with his life.”  
Sawamura raised an eyebrow.  
“His little business, it was his whole life. His dream. Our company wanted to buy them out and eventually he agreed. Only through my god-like persuasion and charisma though.”  
“Probably you bullying them or threatening them.” Daichi mutters under his breath loud enough for Oikawa to hear.  
“Rude, I am the epitome of sensitivity."  
"Alright. We’ll double check your alibi with your company.”

  
"Are we done? Or should I call a lawyer for doing my job and taking a walk. I plead guilty to saving our environment.”  
“Did you see any suspicious persons as you were leaving? Or any perhaps while you were on your way home?”  
He looks thoughtful for a moment,

”No, maybe he went through a different exit. If I were a criminal I would use the back door not the lobby.”  
“If you were criminal the whole city should be terrified.”

  
“Why you say that Sawamura?” He leans in with an uncanny interest.  
“I’ve never met anyone so brutal and manipulative in volleyball, I’d hate to think how that translates to killing.”  
“Hmmm. I’m not sure I deserve your image of me from just a couple college games.”  
“I think your teammates put it best, it’s scary to be your friend because you know everyone’s weakness,”  
“Are we done yet?” He huffs apparently growing tired of what was him literally defending his innocence in a murder trial.  
"Last question."

  
"What?" He bites ever impatient, as if the entire legal system was inconveniencing him.  
"How does Iwaizumi put up with you?”

  
“Good question Sawamura. I guess I must be good at something.” He arches his eyebrows in a way that makes Daichi feel more than uncomfortable.  
“Oh god, oh no, ugh.” Too much information.  
“You asked,” He sings shamelessly.  
“Okay, we’re done.”

  
Daichi shuffles away trying not to feel too harassed.  
He walks into the viewing room and watches Iwaizumi periodically bump his head against the wall.

  
“He’s such an idiot.”  
Sawamura can only give him a sympathetic smile.  
“Sorry about that Sawamura. I’ll give him an earful later.”  
“Alright, chief.”  
“Coffee.” Kageyama steps in and hands off the tray.  
“Well I gotta go make some calls and then he should be clear,”  
“Thanks Daichi.”  
“No problem.”

I’ll be happy when he’s out of the station too is what he adds quietly to himself.

  
\-----  
Kageyama paces away from the interrogation room trying not to look too shell-shocked.  
What is Oikawa doing here???

  
That was definitely alarming. There was one word that came to mind when he thought about this man and it was ‘danger’.  
“I can’t believe Bakageyama is so clumsy.” A little shrimp harps in.  
“Shut up dumbass.”

  
He doesn’t remember when Hinata appeared but he finds himself constantly running into the little ginger. And if Kageyama was being truly honest, he didn’t really hate it. It wasn’t often people reached out to him.

People spent more time avoiding him because he seemed scary or unfriendly, and in reality he was both. People never went out of their way to spend time with him, not even animals, not even dogs. Dogs love everyone. And yet they always run away from Kageyama. Not that it bothered him, animals were dumb. It wasn’t a concern of his at all. At all.

  
“Hey what’s your problem?” He finally squinted at the orange fuzz.  
“huh?” He jumps a bit, eyes big and brown.  
“Why are you always bugging me?” His stare intensifies as if the answer was something he could figure out by squinting long enough.  
“Wh-what? I just-” just really like you and have a huge crush on your jerk ass and god you’re so pretty is what Hinata definitely wasn’t going to admit to his raven haired partner.  
“-Just happen to run into you a lot. I mean we’re partners right so it’s normal to talk to you sometimes…” He starts defensively. For good measure he adds, “....Got a problem with that?” he meant to say aggressively but instead came out shy and a bit coy.

  
Kageyama pauses for a moment, “No, not really.”  
“Really??” Hinata’s eyelashes do that fluttering thing he does when he’s actually surprised, and Kageyama doesn’t know why he bothers to notice these things.  
“....yeah?” He blinks. There’s no sarcasm in his voice, just firm and almost confused like someone asked him if he had black hair.  
“You don’t mind me being around you?”

  
“...no?” He didn’t think it was anything special, it was just the truth. Hinata’s company was comfortable, conversation came easily and even when it didn’t it was fine. He could sit and just chew on meat buns together, both of them lost in their own thoughts, silence not heavy but peaceful. If Hinata wanted to say something he would, and if he was upset then they would just fight, everything was just, simple.

There’s some level of trust that comes with feeling so open with a person and he feels like that level of naturalness he feels in Hinata’s presence is something kind of weird to develope with a person you’ve met less than a month a ago. And yet, it’s so ordinary and ingrained, it’s like it was always like that, like they’ve been partners for a long time.

  
“...So we’re friends?”  
“Friends?”  
“Yes Bakageyama, the F-word.”  
“Fuck.”  
“No, Friends!”

  
Kageyama had this constipated look on his face which was very analogous to his emotional state.

It was something so simple and prevalent, and yet it was a relational hurdle he hadn’t crossed in years. In his contemplation he spared the little midget a glance and immediately noticed a flush of pink on his cheeks.

Is he angry or something? And yet his eyes weren't glaring but in fact they weren’t looking at Kageyama, they were staring at the floor. Why’s he acting all shy-  
And then Hinata rammed into a lampole. Actually it wasn’t a lamp pole, but it was just as tall and inhuman as one, it was Tsukishima Kei.

  
“Whoops sorry!” Hinata burst.  
He sneered in response.  
“What the hell are you doing here?” Kageyama jumps in, in a way he swears is not defensive over the little midget.  
“Forensics.” He answers expressionlessly, holding up a lanyard with a ID, and coldly adds “Try not to make a fucking scene.”

  
Why the fuck was everyone here? Are they just fucking with him now?  
Hinata peered over at both of them curiously, before the giant unfriendly blonde sauntered off as quickly as he came.

  
“You know each other?”  
“He’s just an asshole.”  
“Okay...?” He looked unsatisfied with that but Kageyama was not eager to discuss relationships he developed through crime networking, “We need to hurry up and go to our post, if you lag I’ll leave you behind.”  
“It’s a race then Bakageyama.”  
“I’m not going to-” but it’s too late because Hinata is already speed walking borderline running turning to stick his tongue out at Kageyama.  
“-lose, dumbass!” he starts the same brisk walk smirking at the advantage his long legs give him. Hinata responds by breaking into a sprint, and getting lost in the moment, Kageyama chases after.

  
“What the heck are they doing?” A very tired looking Kunimi sighs at the subordinate officers. But honestly Kunimi always looked tired regardless of the occasion.  
Kindaichi shrugs, the scene looked alot like a little orange fox running away from a big angry dog but the little orange one is question was giggling like an idiot and the scary looking one had his own smirk threatening to pull.

  
“They are so cute.” Sugawara starts to gush.  
“They are rowdy.” Daichi sighs.  
The other officers exchange a knowing look. Being with Daichi and Sugawara always felt like being with a old married couple. Kunimi made the motion of throwing up to which Kindaichi snorted behind his hand.

  
“Alright, well time to go tell Iwaizumi his boyfriend is free to go.” Daichi exhaled tired.  
Kindaichi could help the inner flinching at the word boyfriend.

  
\------

  
They walk out the room to meet with the freshly released Oikawa looking pleased, hassling one of the rookies with a lecture. His eyes light up when he spots them.  
“Iwa-chan!” He rushes over to be met with a rough jab.

  
“Ow, you brute. This is police brutality.”  
“Shut up Assikawa.”

  
Iwaizumi’s anger is apparently something that won’t make Oikawa hesitate draping himself over Iwa-chan’s shoulder and cuddling against his shoulder like nobody's around watching them. And apparently outward affection doesn’t stifle Iwaizumi’s belligerence as demonstrated by another rough punch to Oikawa’s gut who simply “omphs” before just squeezing tighter.  
Kindaichi looks pale.

  
“You okay?”  
“O-oh yeah, thanks.” the junior officer replies nervously.  
It feels like every officer besides Iwaizumi notices that Oikawa’s eyes sharpen a bit as they regard Kindaichi. Yeah Daichi can feel a migraine coming on, there’s far too much love related drama in this godforsaken gay-ass police force. Iwaizumi eventually drags out his long limbed boyfriend out. He flips on some sunglasses that apparently people as gaudy as Oikawa always carry around.

They watch his back as he departs down the steps of the exit, he tilts his head a bit to smirk and something twinges in Dachi's gut. He likes to think he has a good instinct and something just feels wrong about Oikawa's smile, eyes unreadable behind the shade of tinted glasses.

  
"Have we got the results back from forensics yet?" He mutters lowly to Suga.  
"No, not yet, why?"  
"No reason..."

  
Oikawa flashes them all one last big grin, the setting sun etching deep shadows on his defined features. Iwaizumi lets out a huff and walks back, the shadows ever growing in the dimming day light. He feels a restlessness wiring in his limbs, he braces himself for the falling of night, wondering what darkness will fall in these hours. Right now, the red sky slowly dies into the chilly twilight blue.

  
‘If I were a criminal’ huh? Daichi reminiscences the interrogation, not noticing the intense stare from his silver hair colleague. Everything during the day is like a play, a mundane facade, now that it’s night, the real show begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH HO HO foreshadowing! I hope this chapter wasn't too slow, hopefully we'll get some more action next chapter? We'll get to some more actiony stuff and emotional stuff. You have no idea how many tender feelings I hold for each one of you who clicks on this and leaves a kudos or comment, it makes my day and I'm just really honored :) You guys have left the nicest commentary and it really keeps me going. I hope you'll continue to leave feedback because it really helps the writing process, don't be afraid to let me know what you like and don't like, thanks so much <333 Subscribe to keep updated :D  
> Cookie for you if you got to ref to Kageyama's current concern: animals seem not to like me. My blueberry is literally too precious.


	5. The Pathetic and the Apathetic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He doesn’t care if he scratches away all of his skin, leaves himself vulnerable and doomed bleeding out until there’s nothing left. He wouldn’t mind to just peter away, to just disappear.  
> It’s not that unappealing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who’s back, back again, shady’s back, tell a friend.  
> Okay but shitty eminem songs aside (literally the only one I know lol) I finally finished this chapter after my apparent impromptu haitus. New chapters will come much sooner and regularly! Thanks to everyone who read this series or kudos or commented, you are the driving force behind my writing <3 I have so many ideas for this fic but it’s so hard to tie them together, I’ve been brooding over this chapter forever but I’m finally just going to let it loose, see what happens. In this chap we learn some shit about Tsukki and Hinata, fun times. Don't be scared by the character death tag, no one's dying _yet_ lol  
>  TW:dermatillomania  
> TW:Self-harm

Stop.

  
He can feel grimy fingers strangled through his hair, his head pounding and his sides aching with bruises to last for weeks.  
He remembers squeaking earlier, “Just take my money and leave me alone.”

  
But apparently that just was encouraging, he doesn’t know why he would expect them to be satisfied with just that but he didn’t truly realize his mistake until they were dragging him by the hair and slammed him against a wall. The air is knocked from his lungs, he hacks some choked coughs.

Fire in his blood, his cheek flushed rose, searing with thorn like pain, they slapped him hard.

There's the metallic taste rolling on his tongue, his chapped lips dripping red, all he tastes is bitter crimson. His throat squeezing tight, his eyes prickle out salty tears, he looks at their dark eyes and all he feels is fear, oh god he's so scared, so miserable.

He hurts, he can't breathe, he can't scream and it's horrifying. Every time instinct tells him to run, to freeze, to fight and yet he can't help but want to die right then and there.

  
A tall figure is standing on the sidelines coincidentally in the same abandoned alley.  
He watches the scene eyes empty and unimpressed.

  
“Pathetic.” He mutters loud enough for them to hear.  
“What the fuck was that?” They turn noticing him for the first time.  
“You heard.” He repeats slight smirk haunting pale lips.  
“I think you should mind your own damn business.” One of them tries to intimidate him, pressing his face close, it only emphasizes the large height difference though. He grabs at his collar and apparently that was too close.

  
There’s the sound of a gunshot right at the brick inches away from the face of one of the aggressors.  
“Listen here, you’re in the wrong side of town, I clean the street of scum like you, like you’re gum stuck to the bottom of my shoe.” Both of them look as if their skin has been dipped in ice, goosebumps prickle their skin and color starts to fade from their cheeks.

His voice is so chilling, so callous, it’s smooth and perfect yet unnatural, unfeeling, almost inhuman. It takes only a couple more moments before the pair connects the bullet hole in the wall back to the expressionless face in front of them and realize that scattering off in different directions would be a good idea at this point. They both run like cowards ignoring their earlier prey in favor of avoiding confrontation with a larger animal.

  
Tsukishima looks at the boy pressed against the wall heaving out exhausted breath after breath, shaky hands bringing up a sleeve to wipe off a drip of blood from his lips. Wobbly legs eventually collapse to the ground, his sits on his knees already curling in on himself. He only glances at Tsukishima quickly before casting his almond eyes down to his lap and willing the composure to pull some tissues from his pocket.

There’s a moment of awkward silence as the stranger wipes blood from his nose and Tsukishima stands silently staring from the corner of his eye, never making any motions of drawing closer. Partly because he has his namesake of being an apthetic ass hole is reminding him that he isn’t the kind of compassionate sap to go out of his way to help every victim caught on the streets and partly because this stranger somehow resembles a frightened animal prone to running or screaming if any sudden movements were to occur.

So he tries to calmly ignore him.

Which is easy because it’s his usual course of action, not getting involved.

  
The stranger looked up at him, eyelashes wet and face pale, most memorable feature a smudge of crimson over freckle splattered cheeks “Th-thanks,” He snuffled and blew his nose again.

But the sound was drowned out by approaching revv of a car engine which stopped right in the alley. He flinched at the sudden noise, and his heavy lid eyes scrunched in the face of the bright headlights. Tsukishima shrugged and headed to the vehicle. He closes the door behind him without deigning another glance to the crumpled figure still sitting in the alley.

  
“Who was that?”  
“Don’t know.” Tsukishima answers disinterested.  
“Dangerous time to be out in this part of town,” He responds, voice tinged with concern, since this was Kuroo, and unlike Tsukishima he still slightly gave a damn about others. Must be an after effect of playing cop for so long.  
“Definitely.” He mumbles neutrally.  
“Where are heading?”  
“We’re going to say hi to thug who's been embezzling money.”  
“Alright.” He replaces the missing shell with a resounding click of metal.

  
\----

  
An old door creaks open.

  
“Hey buddie, I’m home.” Hinata declares as he steps in, warm air brushing against his night chilled skin. A small golden dog faithfully rises to the call and sprints quickly to his side.  
“Miss me? Must be lonely on your own.” He smiles patting the top of furry head and walks over to kitchen.  
“All by yourself in this empty old house.....I would be lonely too."

  
He sighs and glances at the table, smooth polished wood surrounded by empty chairs. He’s honestly too tired to make dinner right now, he would probably subsist of take out and frozen food if not for Yaachi his god send angel of homemade cooking. Every once in a while she comes over and makes enough food to last the next day and he’s eternally grateful.

  
He opens up his laptop and starts chewing on leftovers. He tries to ignore the sickness that fills his stomach when he looks across the empty chairs. He tries not to think about laughter, small talk, plates full of homemade food and hands reaching under the table to sneak scraps to the little rascal of a dog pawing at their knees.

  
He definitely doesn’t think about his sister, little bright curls tied up in a ponytail, happily chatting about whatever girls do at school, innocent banter like friends and movies and sports. How she had started to play softball on her school team and how they better come cheer for her.

Their mom would smile and their dad would rustle through the newspaper small grin peeking from the thin sheets. Her eyes her happy and bright and she was so excited about everything, she was just like her big brother, full of sunshine like a summer.

  
She was too young, too young to be gone.  
He looked down to notice that all he was doing was stabbing at his food mindlessly, the torn penne and marinara starting to look a murder scene-.  
….He wasn’t hungry anymore.

  
\---

  
“Tsukki, wake up we’re on our way!” Is the message playing on the answering machine as he shifts awake.

  
He dragged himself from dull thoughtless sleep. He didn’t dream anymore, he didn’t feel anymore. But it wasn’t like he cared anymore either.  
He pulled himself from the grip of heavy white sheets, twirled around him to preserve whatever warmth was left in this empty shell of a body.

  
He already feels his hand on his shoulder, brushing over the scarred skin, he’s already scratching at the wound like a dog nips at his injured paws. He looks over his skin, torn and ravaged with blood with both disgust and a strange sort of satisfaction. He hates the scabs, he pulls at them until blood spills fresh, until the flesh is tender.

He doesn’t really understand it either, but he finds himself scratching at himself unconsciously, dull nails dragging against dry skin, he wants feel the pull of skin ripping apart, crimson heat spilling over his wrists, there’s an odd addiction, an odd satisfaction to it. He’s well versed enough to put a name to it, dermatillomania, probably part of his obsessive compulsive disorder, a yearn for control or a yearn for self punishment, he’s not sure, but again, he didn’t really care anymore.

  
He doesn’t care if he scratches away all of his skin, leaves himself vulnerable and doomed bleeding out until there’s nothing left.

He wouldn’t mind to just peter away, to just disappear.  
It’s not that unappealing.

  
For now he buttons up a collared shirt, long sleeve and fastened to the neck. Enough to cover his shoulders, collar and arms, the only scars visible the ones peeking from his neck and wrists.

  
He glances at himself in the mirror, it looks the ghost of a man he’s never met before. There’s a whistle from below beckoning to an old window, paint curling off the molded wood. It reminds him of himself, rotten from the inside; falling apart.

  
He looks down his window and there’s already a black car waiting, and then there’s Kuro standing there untamed black hair and unsettling grin, wearing a pair of black sunglasses over cat like eyes.

  
“Rise and shine sleeping beauty, hurry up.” He calls.  
“Tell Tsukki I said Hi!!!” An obnoxiously loud voice pesters from the car.  
“Bokuto says Hi.”  
“I heard.”

  
With a heavy sigh he heads out.

  
\---

  
It isn’t until he walks through the station doors that he feels normal again. He slips on his uniform and he sets up his walkie talkie. He takes a moment to look at his badge, Hinata Shouyou, it proudly reads.

He breathes slow, in and out, and recites to himself; everything is okay, everything's okay, nothing terrible is going to happen again, you’re fine, you’re a cop and you did this to be stronger.

  
His eyelids feel swollen from sleep deprivation, he pops a pain killer with a swig of cold water. He stares out the window at the endless grey of morning sky, the monotone colors are vaguely comforting. Finally he smiles like he didn’t cry himself to sleep and tries to find Kageyama. There’s no good reason for it, it’s almost mindless, he just feels right being next to him.

  
“Wow you look like shit.” Is the raven haired officer first response to seeing him.  
“Shut up ass hole.” Okay maybe he really didn’t pull off the healthy and happy facade as well as he was hoping to.

He wasn’t exactly a good actor and he felt like shit.  
He suddenly remembered that he was stupid enough to forget to eat breakfast too, shit he’s been out of it. So he lunges for a pack of Donettes on Kageyama’s desk.

Kageyama is used to this sort of thing by now and holds it up high where he knows Hinata can’t hope to reach.  
“Oh my god, this is mine dumbass.” He starts but Hinata is already reaching for it and grabbing at his wrist.  
“Shut up Bakageyama, I’m starving, I haven’t eaten since yesterday lunch.”

  
Suddenly he stopped moving, which made Hinata stop moving and realize that he was really close to Kageyama, but if he noticed he didn’t care because he just looked down at Hinata, blue eyes with an expression unreadable.

“Why didn’t you eat last night?”  
“Wasn’t hungry….Honestly I was so tired I just hit the sack without thinking about it.” It’s sort of a lie but he’s not about to divulge his own patheticness to Kageyama, it was humiliating enough.

Why was he so weak? He felt so sick last night he only recalls choked wretches over the sink, shivering under the warmth of shower water as he washes away his own self-disappointment, why couldn’t he ever be stronger? He crawled under the sheets and gripped at his pillows, fists balled tight, eyes scrunched closed, breathing heavy, he didn’t didn’t sleep for one moment and yet he recalls so many nightmares.

  
“Only a dumbass like you would forget to eat.” He huffs and lowers his arm, “Here, have it, you need the energy more. You need to be at the top of your game to be my partner.”  
“Thanks?”  
“You two, get over here, we found a body, it’s fresh, last night. We’re going to the scene right now.”  
“Right.” They both respond in unison.  
“When we’re done we’re going to eat a real lunch dumbass, no wonder you look like shit.”  
“I can’t tell whether you’re being nice or starting a fight.” He pouts.

  
Kageyama scoffs but Hinata catches the tiniest glimpse a smile playing on his lips. It’s small and different than the other awkward attempts he’s seen Kageyama try. Hinata ignores the soft rush in his chest, it’s different than the shy, coy flutterings that you would think in romance novels.

No, it was exhilarating, being with Kageyama was exciting. He wasn’t sure what the excitement was supposed to be, sometimes he wondered if he just really wanted to fight him but it seemed a little deeper than that.

He nibbles on the cheap chocolate glazed treat thoughtfully before realizing that deep conceptual thought wasn’t his forte as he crashed into a telephone booth.  
“Dumbass, stop goofing off.”  
“Uh, right!” He mumbles absently, shifting into the car.

  
They arrive on scene slightly late. The other officers are busy muttering amongst each other, details, information, times, evidence, they blend into the white noise surrounding the body.  
He looks down at the grisly scene, one of the team starting to trace white lines around the figure.

He feels the sickness churning again in his stomach and wills himself not to vomit right there. There’s a shine in those dead eyes, no one dares closes them like they do in the movies to lay them to rest, such an action could deter valuable evidence, and yet as they stare out open and empty he can’t help but feel their accusing glare.  
Another person he’s failed.  
He looks over to Kageyama, wondering how he’s coping, considering he’s new it might be the first time he’s seen such a gruesome scene.  
“Kageyama-”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Hinata starts but when he looks over, Kageyama’s blue eyes seem placid, calmly he takes a drink of water and surveys the room.

  
“You think it was a robbery?” Kageyama whispers, tall dark head tilting slightly toward him.  
“Uhhh- m-maybe?” He finds himself caught off guard, he was still in shock from the scene he hadn’t even thought to analyze the circumstance yet.

  
“I think so, it seems like someone really tore up this house, more than what would happen from resistance, it seems like they were looking for something.” There’s a deepness of thought he never expected from Kageyama, he was an airhead most of the time but he supposes he’s an officer for a reason.  
“Y-yeah. You’re right.” He mutters, suddenly feeling out of breath.

  
Kageyama takes a moment to look concerned, or maybe that was just his usual glare, he’s not sure.

Then walks out of the room.  
Pathetic. He hasn’t changed a bit, he’s still the weak person who couldn’t protect anyone.

Vulnerable and dependent on the sacrifice of others. He looks down at the body, the blood that spills from the very corner of their lips, the bruises lines along their neck, it’s too familiar.

It’s too horrible to think of the things that have past, the memories seep into the back of his mind like a chill. He feels a tingle run down his spine, numbness on the tips of his fingers, his air seems trapped within his lungs as he chokes on his own breath, he doesn’t want to think about it, he doesn’t want to remember it and yet it’s like it never really leaves his mind.

  
He swallows down the tears, he didn’t become an officer to cry, he didn’t swear to protect and serve only to break down.

_It’s not them. It’s not them._

  
“Hinata are you alright?” Sugawara eyes him carefully, light brown eyes studying the pace of his breath, the color of his face, he was disturbingly good at reading people from their physical cues.  
“Uhm yeah, just give me a moment.” He mumbles with a weak smile.  
“It’s okay if you step out Hinata, we got it from here, I understand given your circumstances, these scenes can be….triggering.”  
“It’s really alright, I’m already feeling a little better-” He responds hastily, slight impatience in his tone which he immediately regrets.

  
“We’re all not as strong as you think we are Hinata, you don’t have to do this to be a good cop. Go brief with Kageyama and wait, we’ll head out to interview some witnesses, that’s priority.” He speaks with a firm finality that he thought only Daichi could achieve, his normally friendly eyes look stern and yet not unkind, he couldn’t ever stop looking kind if he tried.  
“Alright…..thanks.” He words slowly before turning out the door, fists clenched stubbornly, frustrated with no one but himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Delete this fic, Oh my god, whenever I read this I feel so embarrassed. I really hope you guys like it or else I’ll probably crawl under a rock forever lol Thanks to everyone who’s reading my fic :D It means the whole world to me, really. My goal for this fic was to get 100 kudos by chapter 7 and we’re already at 99, so excited C:  
> Updates should come soon, subscribe to keep up and leave feedback if you want, it really drives me, your words are pretty much everything to me UwU  
> Hit me up on totally-atooruble @ tumblr (I'm thinking I'm going to add more writing on this account, so check it out! <3)


	6. Cleaning the Slate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyday it feels like it was just yesterday he was living that life.  
> He’s left that all behind now though, he’s had to.  
> But that doesn’t make it any easier.  
> It doesn’t warm the chill in his blood, doesn’t ease the tightness in his joints. It doesn’t settle the sickness that weighs down his core and the swell of his throat when he thinks about how it will feel to be on opposite sides of a bullet with people he loves. When, in a kill or be killed situation, he’s not even completely sure what would be worse.  
> When his hand shakes, will it be fear for his own life?  
> ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!!! Sorry for taking so long??!!! Life has been a ride. Butttt at least this is an extra long chapter!! I'm excited to finally finish up this chapter because we're finally through with introducing most of the characters! We haven't really got into the thick of the plot yet which makes me even happier that people have been sticking around and being supportive already :) this chap is basically suga and a surprising amount of kiyoko.

 

The brunette officer tiredly taps the tip of his pen against his clipboard, eyes absently scanning the tedious paper forms and logs,

“So...what did forensics say?” He inquires between a yawn.

 

“Well, we got an incision across the throat, blah blah blah judging by the direction of the blood splatters blah blah…..and the blood that’s lining his mouth blah blah…. probably went down from choking on his own blood.” 

Sawamura vaguely thinks he should be paying more attention to this report, but he also vaguely thinks they should be paying him more for having to listen to reports at 1 AM.

“Pleasant.” 

He remarks flatly, before taking a long gulp of water.

“We’ll have to do an autopsy to make it official though.”

“Right.” He nods, already turning to start a brisk stroll down the hall.

 

“Daichi.” 

The silver haired officer calls from behind before jogging over to walk in step.

“Hey, so how you doing?” Sawamura glances at the equally exhausted officer.

 

“Fine, been on the clock since we found the victim this morning. I managed to get an extended break on the upside though.”

“You should head home, it’s been a long day.”

“Don't worry about it, I've been running back and forth all day but not its as bad as the rookies have it, they have all the grunge work right now. Including looking for any witnesses.”

 

“How’re they holding up.” He brings up concerned.

“Well…” Suga gazes to his lower right, head tilting in a shrug.

\--

 

“Nothing!” 

Hinata groans visible only as an orange mop of hair tucked between two folded arms on his desk. “We got absolutely nothing!!”

“Nobody heard anything.” 

Kageyama adds flatly while mindlessly balancing note cards on his desk.

“No one knows anything.”

Kunimi reaffirms before flicking a card and collapsing the makeshift tower.

“And the information they do give us, leads to nowhere.” 

Kindaichi mumbles, frowning as Kageyama starts stacking again with a dead look in his eyes for the 3rd time in a row Kunimi has knocked it down.

 

“C’mon it’s too early to talk like that.” Sugawara asserts hopefully, giving his most encouraging smile. His subordinates glance at him blandly before going back to their mind numbing tasks. 

 

Except for Hinata who bursts up from his huddled position.

“You’re right! There’s still a lot more people and ideas to consider…! But it’s just that feeling of deja vu, it’s like that hotel case again. It’s only been a few weeks and yet that case is starting to get cold, we couldn’t anywhere on it.”

 

His tone tinged with frustration, little brown eyes scrunched with disappointment.

“Did we ever get anything back from forensics?” 

A deep voice finally cuts in, Sawamura sitting straight in his seat, arms folded and face rigidly neutral.

 

“Apparently nothing of value.” Suga sighs, leaning heavily into the cushioned office chair, golden brown eyes staring into the air thoughtfully.

“I see.” Sawamura replies mildly, brows furrowing for just a moment before smoothing into a smile.

“Well, that just means we’re going to have shape up, first thing tomorrow I want you guys to ask around as much as you can on patrol. We’ve got to hit something at some point.”

“Right.” They all concede in unision.

\-----

 

Daichi mutters something on the phone, nodding to himself as if the caller could see the gesture himself. He hums something that sounds like a confirmation and glances at Sugawara with a suspiciously wary face.

 

“Hey Sugawara,” 

 

Suga flinches at the sound, he recognizes that tone, that’s the sincerely apologetic and imploring tone that Sugawara is embarrassingly weak to. And as he chances a peek of course it’s paired with those puppy eyes.

 

“I hate to ask you this but we got a tip.”

“A tip?” He blanches, he already knows what this means.

“Someone spotted a car with no license plate on the road, they mentioned it was taking an exit towards some old factory warehouses.”

 

“So basically it’s sounds suspicious and it’s the first lead we’ve gotten in weeks and you need me, the only one left at this godforsaken department at least half conscious, to come with you even though it’s 3AM.”

“Yeah, pretty much.” 

Daichi scratches the back of his head sheepishly and if it wasn’t so damningly endearing to Suga he might have actually thought of refusing.

 

But he doesn’t, because declining Daichi is not what he does, it goes against the reputation he’s built up since the first day he was signed onto the job.

“Here’s the keys, you’re driving.” He sighs, ruffling his bangs back and sauntering to the car.

 

\-----

 

“Is this it?” He nods in the direction of the warehouse they've stopped in front of. It’s in line with other battered storage houses checkered in varying degrees of peeling white paint.

 

“Yeah...although I don’t see any cars.”

“We’ll have to check around for signs of anyone being here recently...”

 

Suga shifts out the cop car, moonlight adorning silver hair like a crown of shimmer, shine gently resting along the length of a delicate nose and the tops of high cheeks. 

From the corner of his eye he sees Sawamura looking at him blankly, embarrassed almost, but it lasts just a second before his attention is returned to the building and Sugawara contributes it to wishful thinking.

 

The night’s eerily silent. His nerves wrack at every small crack and rustle of sound, he practically jumps out of his skin when Sawamura yanks open the door with the screech of rusty metal. 

 

As they enter they’re greeted with pitch black, blindly they feel up the walls for a light switch with no luck.

The first thing that alarms him is the stickiness under his foot, a gross wet slicking noise with every step. He looks down and his mind goes to materials like oil or paint but the darkness makes it impossible to distinguish.

  
  


“Hey Daichi could you give me a hand?”

“What are you doing?”

“Stepped in something weird.”

 

He reaches into his belt for a little cheap plastic flashlight, with a click he finds glossy red puddles surrounding him, in the corner of his eye a stiff and pale hand coldly rests on the dirty warehouse floor.

 

He jumps back, almost slipping if not for colliding into a solid pillar. But the pillar is warm and smells faintly like cologne, he peeks up to find he landed into sawamura whose steadying him by both shoulders.

 

Mindlessly he redirects the flash back in the direction of the hand on the ground, partly just to make sure it’s still there.

 

“I guess you got that helping hand.” Daichi mumbles under his breath.

“Very funny.” He responds sarcastically.

 

He shifts his grip to let the light creep into the corners of the dark room, there's dozens of faces, hollow and sunken with horror. Their brows still grimaced in pain, others with mouths gaping wide open like beached fish. 

 

You can tell who died quickly, terror still running fresh though their veins, eyes wide and shining. And who died slowly, nails broken from clawing against the ground as they bled out, bruised faces scrunched in rage and agony.

 

“Oh my god.” He mumbles, his bones in his knees suddenly feel soft, he finds himself resting his weight against his commanding officer’s chest. Which in another circumstance probably would have been more enjoyable….

 

“Hey….” Daichi gives his shoulder a gentle squeeze. “You alright?”

He blinks and tries to gather enough sense to respond in words.

“Yeah….we should probably call for backup….” He mutters slightly dazed at the brutality of the scene.

 

“Let's wait outside….-what was that?”

Both of them jolt at the sound of shattering glass.

He flashes his light against all the walls until he finds a door, cautiously they approach.

 

“Wait right here, I’ll go check it out.” He holds one arm in front of Koushi while steadily inching toward the entrance.

 

There it is again, that selflessness that defines Sawamura. That almost protectiveness he exudes for Sugawara, and probably any person he reminds himself.

 

“Daichi, I’m an officer too you know?”

“...Sorry.” There’s a hint of flush against Daichi’s cheeks which Suga doesn’t know to attribute to shyness of the cold.

 

“But it still stands, if something happens to me I’ll need back up.”

Suga nods, albeit reluctantly.

 

This door is quiet, it flicks open with only a small click, leading down a long corridor, everything is silent and still, only thing that stands is the long shadows and slits of moonlight creeping from the window. 

Sawamura tiptoes down first, entering the first room down the hall.

Suga leans against the wall, clears his mind to try to pinpoint any suspicious sounds. 

He hears voices, but they’re hushed, his fingers instinctively curl around his holster. Heart racing and skin cold he starts stalking down the corridor, slow…..cautious...when he finally hears a call, “Suga, we got a civilian here.”

 

“What?”

“I’m heading over to you.”

“Alright,” His eyebrows raise as he sees Daichi return with a shaken woman walking closely.

“Who are you?”

“Shimizu Kiyoko.” She mutters back quietly, head dipped low.

“What are you doing here?” He continues softly.

 

She doesn’t respond though, simply bites down her lips and glues her eyes to the ground. She’s quite pretty, beautiful even. Ebony hair falls to curtain her cheeks, the darkness makes the pale of her face even brighter. Crystal clear blue eyes add a pop of color to the powdery white of an elegant visage.

 

Sugawara tilts his head with a sigh of acceptance, he'll ignore awkwardly silent behaviour of the victim for now. He tries to maintain a casual air but he can practically feel the nervousness radiating from the smaller female. She's visibly trembling, although most likely from the cold. She wasn't exactly dressed weather appropriate, a very flattering and impractical dress was all she had, scantily clad at best.

 

Sawamura looks sympathetic for a moment before removing his coat and offering it in front of her. She stares at it confused before eventually grabbing it with an appreciative nod.

“Please don’t worry ma’am. Everything is going to be fine.” Daichi adds with his strong voice and Suga nods deeply to try mask the sudden fluttering in his chest.

He wonders if he’ll ever get used to the sound of Daichi’s ‘reassuring’ voice, the deep professional tone he uses to assuage people in need, it’s gentle and confident all at once. 

It’s been years and the effect it has on Sugawara hasn’t seem to fade, in fact it seems to be getting worse, he feels a kink starting to form.

Shit. Sugawara muses to himself. 

 

Daichi tells them he’s going to check the rest of the house meanwhile Suga leads Beautiful And Hopefully Not A Murderous Psychopath, Shimizu Kiyoko to the car. He rests a thumb against the back of his gun just in case.

 

His eyes scan the witness, her clothes are promiscuous at best, ridiculous given the weather though. She doesn’t seem the murder type, there’s a couple splatters of blood on her leg but he assumes if she was the one who took down a roomful large men she’d be a bit worse for wear.

 

He getting a feel for the situation, “So…..I’m going to assume, you’re not exactly here for completely legal reasons.”

There’s no response but a definite jump in her shoulders.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to arrest you or anything like that. I would just like you to tell me what happened.” He tries to sound as assuring as possible.

 

“One of those men, in that room over there…..was my employer…...As you might have guessed, I’m a sex worker...” She anxiously starts stammering, looking up self consciously between small pauses. “Sometimes he brings me around with him, I think he liked to show off. He was discussing deals with the other men about human trafficking…” 

Her eyes seem to drift deeper into her own thoughts as she describes the memory, “...the way he talked about it…..like the girls were just merchandise….”

Suga simply nods for her to continue, trying to conceal the waves of emotions he’s empathizing with her.

“I was so frustrated...I stole a gun from him a couple weeks ago...today, I was going to shoot him when I got the chance, I didn’t care if the rest of the guys killed me for it, I had to do it if it was the last thing I did.” 

Her teeth gnaw into her lips with the intensity of her voice rising to a growl and falling to a soft whisper, “.....But before I could-...”

 

“....-Everyone was killed…..A couple men rushed the doors and opened fire. They didn’t leave a single man breathing, even the people standing right beside me were suddenly on the ground- bleeding. I didn’t even hide or scream I was too terrified, a couple of them were staring at me even as they were murdering the other men.”

 

“I thought I was next. But when they were done, they walked up to me and smiled and asked me my name. One of them was really short and the other was bald, both were really loud and energetic. When I told them my name they got really excited and left with some other person.”

 

Suga’s face is already buried in his palm much to the concern and confusion of Kiyoko-san.

Oh my god, it was those two idiots. He thinks to himself exasperated.

 

“Did the short one have a streak of blonde hair? And did the bald one have a really scary face?”

“...Yes.”

“That was….that was Karasuno, yeah, I’ll go get Daichi.” He sighs heavily, “What direction do you think they went?”

“I’m sorry I was in the building when they drove off so I don’t really know.” She admits quietly.

“It’s okay.” Suga shrugs, casually he waves over Daichi who had turned to look over at them from one of the windows.

 

“Are you going to arrest me for my line of work?” She has an almost resigned look in her eyes, her head tips to the floor in rehearsed defeat.

“Like I said earlier, no. And if someone else asks you can tell them you were kidnapped here by the men. It’s not like they can testify against you dead. As far as I’m concerned you haven’t done anything wrong.”

“I was going to kill that man, doesn’t that mean I’m dangerous? I stole a gun too.”

“Right...I am going to need to confiscate your gun.”

She blinks at him confused before fumbling to retrieve it.

“Oh...here. Is that really all?”

“Unless you got another one on you then yup.” Sugawara grinned broadly.

 

Sawamura catches up to them, trading suspicious glances between both of their faces.

“I spoke to the witness, Miss.Kiyoko, sounds like it was Karasuno, that gang again.”

“Nishinoya and Tanaka?”

“Yup, we're not exactly sure which direction they headed though.”

“.....We’ll just have to look for them…again.”

“Are they repeat criminals?”

“The better question is if they're ever not causing trouble.” He huffs while scratching the back of tousled silver locks. 

 

He exchanged a knowing look with Daichi as they headed towards the cop car.

“Call Hinata and Kageyama to pick up Miss.Shimizu, we’ll get her testament down in writing.”

“Alright.” He nods and flips out his walkie talkie.

 

Sugawara pauses to glance at her, “Miss.Shimizu, would you mind waiting here for some of our other officers to escort you to the station as witness?”

“...that should be fine.”

“Great. We’ll be on our way, call us if you need any help.”

“Alright!”

\----

 

After an hour of driving down random streets and a couple cases of bad road rage, they end up nowhere. They had been following a suspicious black car braiding through traffic and refusing to pull over but after a meaningless chase they just found found some drunk teen scared shitless of cops.

 

After writing up a ticket and giving a famous parental lecture from Daichi they waved off the car leaving them stranded on the tail of a false lead. The actual culprits long gone at this point.

 

“We couldn’t find them.”

Daichi leans against the car hood, if he was a smoker like Iwaizumi-san this would definitely be the defeated moment to light one up. But he wasn’t so he just rubbed his jaw line thoughtfully, half his mind pondering the inadequacies of the justice system, and the other half wondering when was the last time he shaved.

 

“Of course not,” Suga kicks at the tire of the cop car, he tries to appear as frustrated as possible and not impossibly relieved like he always is from these chases.

 

Thank God. No matter how stupid they are, at least they’ve got Ennoshita to make sure they don’t get caught.

 

He pinches the bridge of his nose and lets out a silent prayer that those two would stop giving him a heart attack. He finds himself tossing his keychain, a little carved bird, swinging it in a circle around his index finger.

 

His thoughts melting into warm memories, wide smiles and laughter, his first friends, his first family.

Rough hands messing his hair, heavy pats on the back, playful shoves against his shoulder, loud awful music blaring on the oldest and shittiest radio anyone could ask for, cheap television set always playing crappy day time shows and soap operas. 

 

The couch is raggedy and lumpy, it smells like gasoline and oil in the living room because fucking Tanaka spilt like half the can on his jeans and didn’t even bother changing, the kitchen table is dirty because Noya can’t wipe off gun powder with a towel like a civilized person and it just ends up getting everything dusty and stained but it’s fine, they never eat there anyway because there’s bills and mail piled up for years on that surface none of them have the courage to look through.

They’re both barbarians, that duo, until their glorified baby sitter Ennoshita comes in and whips them into shape, somehow keeping track of their hectic schedules and jobs well enough to keep them alive. 

 

And he, Suga, was part of that, he sat on that ancient couch, using Noya’s lap as a foot rest, falling asleep on the musty old pillows. He wiped down that table, grimacing at the URGENT OVERDUE notices in red ink. 

 

He cried in that kitchen chopping onions and handing them to Asahi as he cooked something actually edible, an achievement none of them had yet accomplished.

 

Everyday it feels like it was just yesterday he was living that life.

He’s left that all behind now though, he’s had to.

 

He glances over to Sawamura who's now leaning back, his eyelids close, his features relaxed. Like this, the moonlight really paints every curve and shadow of his face, of his cheeks, his jaw, the curve of his lashes, everything.

 

When he looks at that face he remembers why he lives this new life.

But that doesn’t make it any easier.

 

It doesn’t warm the chill in his blood, doesn’t ease the tightness in his joints. It doesn’t settle the sickness that weighs down his core, the swell of his throat, when he thinks about how it will feel to be on opposite sides of a bullet with people he loves.

When, in a kill or be killed situation he’s not even completely sure what would be worse. When his hand shakes, will it be fear for his own life? Or the fear of losing another life?

 

He tucks the keychain into his pocket and nestles back into the car.

\----

 

It’s become a sort of atonement for himself.

To help people the way he couldn’t help himself. Stop them from falling into the ditches the whole world seems to dig around for them.

 

“How are you doing?” Suga smiles sympathetically at Kunimi.

“Tired but fine. We managed to finish the testimony of the witness, the files are already on their way to the courthouse.”

“Good...Where is she by the way?”

“She was just on her way out.” Kunimi shuffles papers together into a clean manilla folder.

 

“Shoot.” He mumbles quickly turning and dashing toward the main exit.

He spots the elegance of a dark figure slowly descending the stairs, the hour glass figure and flutter of black hair gives the identity away.

 

“Wait, Kiyoko-san!!”

He’s met with a startled turn, she adjusts her glasses whilst watching him suspiciously. He slows to a steady walk as he approaches close and holds out a ziploc bag labeled evidence.

“Here you go.”

“I thought you confiscated this…?” She eyes the weapon being shuffled out of the bag.

“Of course I did, if they found that on you at the station you might have gotten in trouble.”

 

She reaches forward and accepts the weight of the cold metal into her fingers, she notices tucked with it is a couple notes. Skeptically, she looks back up at friendly officer.

“Isn’t that sort of thing illegal?”

“Just don’t tell Daichi please, he’s my boss.” He grins sheepishly. “Other than that, I don’t need it and the city is pretty dangerous so stay safe.”

“Thank you…” She pauses for a moment, “No offense but you’re kind of a bad cop.”

“That was a little blunt.”

“S-sorry, I just mean you don’t follow the laws very strictly.”

 

“I think a cop is supposed to protect and serve people more than laws.”

She’s quiet for a moment, lashes fluttering in surprise.

 

Suga starts off again,“Well, I have my information on that card.” He points the little note she holds, “Considering your boss just got brutally murdered you might be out of a job, if you ever need help then just give a call! Or even if you just want someone to talk to that understands. It may sound odd, but I was in a pretty similar situation as yours before I joined the force.”

 

“Thanks.” She smiles for the first time, it’s small and reserved but her cheeks are rosey with genuine happiness.

 

\----

 

Each coin falls into the slot with a metallic clank, the overhead fluorescent lights feel draining on his eyes. He’s so ready to go home.

 

He takes a moment to drearily look through the bright logos and packaging of the vending machine before deciding the neon orange soda was definitely the sugary artificial garbage he felt like ruining his body with tonight.

 

“Did you leave to give her your number or something?” Sawamura asks popping out of literally nowhere.

“No!…” Suga jumps defensively before skirting his eyes, “Well not like that!”

“Sure.” He muses, tone obviously disbelieving.

Suga sighs while crouching for his soda, “Since when have you been so interested?”

“I’ve always been curious.”

  
  


Suga looks up at him suspiciously, Daichi continues anyway, “I was wondering if you were a no-relationships kind of guy.”

“Like some kind of one-night stand only jerk? Or like some sort of celibate monk?”

 

“One night stands only. The girls always beg you to stay but you put on your shades, light a cigarette and tell them your job is too dangerous for love.”

“I prefered the celibate monk idea thanks. I don’t even smoke. That fantasy sound more like Iwaizumi.”

“It kind of was before he settled down with Oikawa. Any girl we rescued or had to interview used to throw themselves at him, I thought he was too traumatized to start a relationship after what happened to his fiancee but it turned out he was just really, really gay.”

“Something about a guy in a uniform, people seem pretty interested in you too.” 

 

Not just girls either, honestly, you never noticed how many gay men there are out there until you’re hanging out with a hot guy…. Wait, Iwaizumi had a fiancee? Before he can ask Sawamura shuffles himself into the car and Suga follows.

 

“I guess, same goes for you too. But I’ve never seen you starting anything with someone.”

“It's that not don't want to…...but, I guess I'm kind lacking initiative.” I like YOU. but I’m too scared to tell you and ruin our friendship like some lame romantic comedy trope.

“Why? You're like…. Perfect.”

 

Sugawara chokes on his soda. He tries his best to smother out his coughs with his arms as discreetly as possible, which was not very discreet at all, after a couple more hiccups and hacks he smiles up at Daichi slightly teary-eyed.

 

“S-sorry, uhm- I don’t think I’m that great. Despite what you may think, I do not have girls lining up to date me.”

“You’re probably just not out there enough, I think you could make someone really happy.”

“Th-thanks.”

“I think you deserve someone who would make you happy too. Especially if you’re actually interested in a relationship.” 

 

The way he speaks is casual, but there’s something heavy about those words. The way his eyes look warm right on the word, happy, like there’s nothing he’d want more than for him to be happy.

 

The thought makes Suga’s heart flutter, lights up his eyes with something dangerous, hope. Suga takes the mood as a chance, he leans in close, hand resting on Daichi’s knee. “I am….I’m…interested in starting something…. something more than friendship.”

 

Daichi with the perception and awareness of a wooden chair simply nods deeply in thought, “I know, I’ll introduce you to a friend of mine. She’d be able to find you a great girl. If it’s just initiative you’re lacking, then it’s up to me as your friend to give you a push.”

 

“What? uh you really don’t have to, I mean... I already have someone in mind.”

“You’re right, first I’ll do everything I can to get you that date with Kiyoko. Think of me as your wingman.”

“Daichi, that just seems like a really bad idea.” He frowns.

 

“Don’t worry about it, trust me. You trust me right?”

“I do,” He looks up at him meaningfully, the warm glare of the streetlights pooling orange-gold in the reflection of caramel irises. 

 

If Daichi glanced over he would have a saw a face honest and desperate with years of devotion and trust, but his eyes were on the road like a good cop. Suga’s face falls and he continues evenly, “...more than anything.”

 

“Great, well see you tomorrow.” The vehicle comes to a stall, the familiar hum of the engine the only sound in the night. Daichi offers a small grin and wave as Suga departs. 

 

Suga climbs out of the car slightly dazed and bewildered at the contents of their conversation.

 

He gives only a short turn to watch the car disappear around a corner before stumbling to his door.

 

It can barely be considered night anymore, it’s still cold and dark but there’s the freshness of morning dew starting to scent the air that flicks his ashy hair and skims his flushed cheeks. 

The horizon is burning with a low glow of the rising sun, confirming how badly he needs to get inside, eat, and sleep. He fiddles a few sleepy uncoordinated moments with the cold metal of his keys before unlocking his door. 

 

He locks the door behind him and exhales slowly. Leans against the doorframe as he numbly unwraps his scarves and sheds off his coat. He lets the warmth of the heater sink into his skin and turns on a kettle in the kitchen.

His house is cozy, he likes it, but he can’t really deny how empty it is. 

 

The furniture is warm and soft, the decoration is pleasant, and there's an assortments of plants he raises like his children. But the walls are barren of any photos, of any familiarity, of any personal memories.

 

It looked lonely. At least to his eyes.

Maybe he just felt lonely here.

 

Everytime he closed that door he felt like he was being shut off from the whole world. In here he was alone. He didn't have much of a personal life, no intimate relationships or connections.

 

Because all the ones he had were cut off, bridges that were burned leaving him alone on his own private island watching the cinders and the smoke fade into the air. Memories just seem like smoke and mirrors, lost fantasies, gentle dreams turned nightmares.

 

He closes his eyes and breathes deeply, tries to ignore the icy cold pouring down his spine as a flood of flashbacks barrage his mind. Gunshots, fire and blood dripping slowly.

 

His fingers clench against the fabric of his sweater, nervously he grips the knitted bunch as his chest heaves up and down.

 

I'm not going to have another panic attack right now. No, don't think about. Don't think about them.

 

But all his eyes see is the shine of Noya's eyes, fire dancing in his golden irises, teeth burying themselves in his bottom lip as he glares at him desperate and distressed. 

 

And Suga just can't breathe, he can't speak, he can't tell him, he can't find words, he's just as clammy and tongue tied as then, he can't tell them what happened to Asahi. 

 

He hears them screaming, Noya begging for answers. His own mind racing and whirling, his heart wracking against his chest. He opens his mouth to confess, he opens his stupid mouth, he can't even hear himself though there's so much ringing in his ears, whistling, sirens-...that's his tea pot. 

 

He blinks out of his trance-like reminiscing and dashes to the kitchen, almost falling because he didn't realize his legs had been reduced to jelly.

He pours the water into his msg laden noodles and places a plate over the lid. While he waits he wipes the slick of cold sweat that built up over his brow in his little jog down memory lane. “Gross.” He mumbles to himself.

 

As a distraction he thinks back to his conversation with Daichi. He vaguely pities himself at this point, the object of his affection is literally trying to hook him up with some girls. Part of him wonders if he should embrace the push, maybe he needs this. Maybe he should just get some nice girlfriend and forget about pining for his senior officer and maybe then he'd have someone beside him on the lonely nights like these where he falls easily into the depths of his own nightmares.

 

Oh wait, he's gay, a girlfriend wouldn't really work out. And as for a boyfriend, firstly he can't imagine asking Daichi to match him up with random dudes, secondly he can't imagine settling with a guy and not feeling dissatisfied it's not Sawamura as stupidly stubborn as that is.

 

‘My life is awful.’ He wallows in mourning for his own social life.

And then he feels a vibration against his thigh. He fumbles for his phone to answer quickly until he reads the name that flashes across the screen.

 

He pauses with a deep tired sigh, “My life really IS awful.”

Reluctantly he swipes to answer.

“Oikawa?”

“Koushiiii~ Morning! How you doing?”

“Terrible, today I-”

“That’s great. Anyway, about me and Iwa-chan. So we’re happy, you know utter bliss, totally in love and all that sappy stuff, but lately I feel like something’s off. You know? Like there’s something wrong, and I might just be paranoid again, but I can’t let it go? Do you get what what I’m saying? Koushi, are you listening?”

 

“.......I’m listening Tooru, sooo trouble in paradise again?”

“Don’t say ‘again’, it’s not like we have problems all the time. Me and Iwa-chan have a great relationship thank you very much.”

“It is great, but that doesn’t stop you from calling me over every single little tiny miniscule problem you have.”

“Not true, you make me sound really petty.”

“Oikawa last time you called you were upset the barista at a coffee shop spelled Iwaizumi’s name with flowers on his cup or something.”

“She dotted the i’s with little hearts!! She was after him.”

“Okay Oikawa what is it this time?”

“Iwa-chan wasn't home until 9 last night.”

“I thought he got off at 6 yesterday.”

 

“Exactly! He said something held him up and didn't want to explain!”

“Hmm maybe something really did hold him up, or maybe he had a 3 hour orgy to attend I don't know how long the exorbitant extra marital affairs you imagine your boyfriend escaping to last.”

“If he was going he would have invited me at least.”

“Right. Maybe he was with the cute barista.”

“She was not that cute, especially not more than me. I know, I asked Iwa-chan, repeatedly.”

 

“You’re not even insecure are you? You just like to be complemented.”

“I don’t have to answer these invasive and offensive questions.”

“It was a statement.”

“Since you’re obviously too blinded by your bitterness and jealousy to offer any useful advice, why don’t you just vent out what’s sticking up your ass.”

“Right, thanks for the outlet.”

 

“Did something happen with Sawamura?” He inquires with surprising genuinity.

It throws Suga slightly off guard, “Sort of…..He really has no idea I’m in love with him.”

“Have you thought of telling him?”

“I don’t think that would end up well. I’m pretty sure he’s not interested in guys. It might make our friendship awkward.”

“That's true, that could happen. It’s up to you if you want to risk it.”

“What about you two?” The other line is silent for a while and Suga wonders if Oikawa understood the question or not.

“I was the one who confessed. I took the risk I guess.”

“Man….I guess I just gotta suck it up and try.”

“Well, really think about it though.” It’s hard for Suga to tell through the phone but Oikawa’s words….sound oddly detached.

 

“Honestly I would give up anything to be in the position you and Iwaizumi-san are in.”

“Be careful when you say anything…lets just say to be where I am now…..I sacrificed a lot.”

“Tooru...Does this have to do with-”

“You know, when I first told Iwaizumi...he didn’t accept it at all.” He mentions it casually, his tone light and conversational.

“Really?!” Honestly that shocked him, given the way they were now it’s hard to even imagine a time they weren’t together.

 

“I told him I’d been in love with him ever since we were young and he...completely rejected me...After that our relationship got really complicated.” His words come out slow and thoughtful, like he’s lost in his own memories.

“Wow...I can’t even imagi-”

“Well I gotta go, thanks for listening Koushi.” He abruptly chimes in pleasantly and surprisingly calm, the dial tone starts beeping before Suga can respond.

 

“He hung up.” He mutters to himself, stomach churning over new found worries. With a sigh he lays flat on his bed and looks to the ceiling fan for answers.

 

Risky. He rolled the word around his mind.

He liked the life he had right now, he liked being Sawamura’s partner and friend. He was happy enough to be a supporting role, he didn’t need to be a main character lead, the beautiful starlet who got swept off her feet by her true love, he would gladly take the trusty and completely platonic best friend part, the handy side kick. When you really thought about it right now he had the ability to do the job he loved beside the person he loved. Not everyone was so lucky.

And then there was the possibility of rejection.

 

It’s one thing to just hold to a wistful crush, never let them know and live always hoping... But it’s another thing to feel the actual defeat and heartbreak of real rejection.

  
  


How will he feel when he knows after years of being so fond of someone that they never once felt that for you. It’s not that he expects reciprocal feelings but it will hurt so much more when his stupidity is brought to his face.

 

He can’t even fathom putting himself in Oikawa’s shoes, getting your heart broken by someone you trust and depend on so much, so deeply.

 

How will he feel when Daichi looks to the ground awkwardly, pain and concern etched upon his face as he musters the courage to turn down his best friend. How will he feel when Daichi starts to hesitate the next time he invites him for drinks after work, when he starts to look nervous and lost on the long intimate silences of patrolling together; conversation falling flat until it their whole relationship becomes dry small talk. How will he feel when Daichi looks at him with pity in his eyes.

 

Honestly just that image alone bothers him so much he’s confirmed his decision.

He’s absolutely never telling him.

 

“Nope.” He declares to no one but himself and his ceiling fan.

He has it too good right now to risk losing everything. With that he buries his face into his pillow case, satisfied with his cowardice. 

 

There’s a nagging feeling in his mind though, guilt? Shame? Shit. 

He forgot about his soup. He sprints back to the counter top to microwave his soggy carby regret.

\---

 

For the second time that night she’s stopped on her way out of the police station. She’s only made it about a block away before a dark car slows down beside her, vaguely she considers running back to the station, it isn’t that far. Another part of her mind reaches for her weapon, slow and hesitant. But she’s frozen in shock when she sees who pops out of the vehicle.

 

“Look who it is! Kiyoko-san! You’re okay!” The small one jumps forward, uncomfortably close.

“You’re just as beautiful as the last time we met!” The other one hangs back and smiles assuringly, but considering his thug like face, his grin is pretty much all but assuring.

 

She stumbles back a bit, “...Well it’s only been a few hours…” Since I watched you two massacre everyone I knew right in front of me.

The perpetually tired looking one scrambles out of the car to apologize, “I’m sorry about them, they mean no harm.”

 

“Where did you go? Did the cops catch ya?” The tiny brunette steps back a bit, but still bounces a bit with each word.

“Sort of…”

“We were worried you got arrested or something!”

“No...but they really want to arrest you.”

“I guess so, but we’re too slick.” He grins smugly, hand reach up to brush back what would be hair if he wasn’t bald.

“Yeah, man.” The little one beams cheekily.

“Sugawara-san knew who you two were from my testament immediately.”

“You were arrested by Suga?!” There’s something faintly fond in his voice that she doesn’t understand the reason for.

 

“Makes sense, he knows us pretty well.” The shorter one looks down, the smile wiped off his face. His expression flat for once this whole conversation.

The bald one apparently takes that as a cue to change the topic. “Well anyway, Kiyoko-san what was a pretty lady like you doin’ in a place like that?”

She looks mildly surprised at the question, “I was the girl of one of the guys you killed…”

“No way, someone as beautiful as you stuck with one of those ugly mugs?”

“SHh-Ryuu! What if she’s upset??? Maybe they were an item?” He pulls him down and whispers loudly in his ear, glancing towards Kiyoko apologetically.

 

“Oh shit, sorry ma’am if we killed your man.” He bows slightly.

“Don’t worry, it wasn’t like that at all. I wasn’t around by choice. If you didn’t kill him I was probably going to get him myself.” She responds quietly.

 

The baldy rests his hand against his hips, thumb hooked under his belt seemingly out of habit, “That’s suicide for a non-professional.” he mentions seriously.

 

“I know.” She looks away to the rubble on the pavement.

“Wow…..uhm were you one of the trafficked girls?”

“Yes. I was bought when I was 15, I’ve been stuck with him since. The only thing that really kept me going was helping the other girls in my situation.”

“That’s awful, I’m glad we put a bullet through his head.”

“Where do you think the other girls are? We can help them.”

“I have no idea, some of them already died, either disease or violence. The ones that are left were already sold and I have no idea how to find them. I don’t really have the money or connections. I don’t even have a job now. I’m useless.”

“Chikara? Do you know?”

“Sadly, afraid not, we weren’t able to track his financial records, I think another group purged them.”

“I’m sorry Kiyoko-san.” Tanaka bows his head down, deep remorse etched along his usually intimidating features.

“Man, that’s fucking shit. We’ll keep trying though.” Nishinoya kicks at the ground frustratedly before looking up at her with a softened gaze.

 

She stands there silent and stiff, watching them carefully with glimmering ocean blue eyes. Abruptly she bows in front of them, inky black hair falling forward like a dark curtain.

 

“Th-thank you! You really got rid of him and all of his gang. I always wished that someday they would all get their justice but I was helpless the whole time. As horrible as it sounds I’m so glad you massacred them all, they deserved it. Every one of them.”

 

“Kiyoko-san….” The calmest of the group, apparently named Chikara, looks perplexed, sympathetic. She peeks up to look at the rowdy two and is taken aback to see tears dripping down their cheeks.

 

“Kiyoko-san!! You’re so strong!!” Tanaka is burying his face in his arm with loud and obvious sniffles.

“That was so beautiful and sad!!!” Noya is on his knees, nose dripping shamelessly as he crumples his pants with his small hands.

“Sounds like it’s been rough for you….” Even Ennoshita rests a hand on his hip and looks somewhat sombered.

 

Noya springs back up and jumps in front of her, “You could always come work for us Kiyoko-san!”

Tanaka nods enthusiastically, “We’d love to have you around!”

“What would I do?” She tilts her head curiously if not skeptical.

“....Hmm I don’t know. Whatever you want to do!” They both grin widely and admittedly childishly.

“We could probably show you how to use a gun.” Noya adds seriously which startles her slightly.

 

“Now guys, we’re not sure if she’s interested in becoming a hitman.” Ennoshita quickly waves off to her relief.

“True, well we could always use someone to answer phone calls or run errands like picking up groceries or bullets and stuff like that. Ennoshita usually manages all our work but he’s busy with his own cases so maybe you could manage everything?”

 

“A manager?” She tries to filter the hopefulness from her voice.

“Yeah, like just make sure we have supplies and keep track our schedules.”

“Are you sure I’m qualified?” She continues bracing herself for disappointment.

 

“Don’t sweat it, Chikara can probably show you the ropes. And honestly you’re probably better at that kind of stuff than me and Ryuu so it would help out.”

“I….I’ll think about it...thank you.” She finishes thoughtfully with a small smile. Both of their faces light up in shock.

“Kiyoko-san smiled.” One of them whispers.

“I’ve been blessed.” The other declares.

 

Ennoshita sighs, “Okay, well I better take these two back. Here’s a card. Call us whenever you feel like it, the offer stands. I could always use another hand to clean up after these two.”

 

She nods and waves slightly as Chikara drags them off into a car like over excited children. 

\---

It’s only been a handful of days and Kiyoko is pacing back and forth her apartment staring intently at the two cards as if they’d run away the second she took her eyes off them.

 

She needed to weigh her options, one she takes the job and delves back into the underground, continues her life in the shadows of society working as a small time manager for a group of friendly hitmen.

 

Or...she takes this opportunity to start a new life, for the first time she has a clean slate. It’s like a miracle, a dream come true, her entire past is wiped away, literally everyone from her old life is missing or dead, she is actually free to move on, to live one of those normal lives she always envied. 

 

One hand though, she’s unemployed….on the other hand she gets a job...and maybe some friends, she was happy...when those 3 actually listened to her story and tried to help...But there’s also Sugawara, he mentioned he’d try to help her get a job too, and that he’d listen if she needed to talk.

 

She feels faintly curious when he said he used to be in a similar position as her, maybe he also used to work underground crime and then moved onto a new life. Maybe she should ask him for advice……

 

Slightly nervous she types the number on the card into her phone.

“Hello?” Says the familiarly cheery voice.

“Hi...this is Kiyoko.”

“Oh!! Kiyoko-san! I was actually going to call you!”

“Really?” She asks slightly surprised.

“I recently found an open position for a job if you’re interested!”

“...Where is it?”

“It’s at a little diner. They need a new manager.”

“Oh,” Her mind is still reeling with this new info, manager? Diner?

 

“I know the workers there, they’re super nice. You can always pop in and tell them I sent you. It’s up to you though.”

“Thanks….really, it means a lot.”

“No problem! I can text you the adress if you want.”

“That would be nice….I’ll think about it.”

“Sure, sure!”

 

A normal job….She thinks to herself as she reads over the address. 

It’s a windy day, loose leaves and littered papers fluttering against the pavement down the streets. Down the path is fallen flower petals raining from the tree, she looks at their bruised and ripped appearance, completely at the mercy of the elements.

Sometimes she feels like that, maybe once she was a flower, everyone told her she was pretty, they still do. But before it made her feel special, now those words seemed poisonous followed by a dirty leer, a wet and disgusting breath down her neck. Maybe once she was flower, but now all she felt like was rotted petals and fallen leaves.

 

Her steps pause in front of the shiny glass door of a cozy looking diner, she gulps before pulling the chilled metal handle.

 

Her high heels clack against the tile flooring, she scans the tables and notes they’re all relatively cute and tidy but very empty. It occurs to her she didn’t actually check the hours.

 

“Oh sorry, we’re closed.” A friendly but timid voice calls from a couple tables down, wiping the counters with a damp rag.

“Sorry, I’m actually just here to drop off my resume…”

“Oh, if that’s the case, let me take a look.” From a distance she thought the waiter was small but the closer he approached she realized he was actually quite tall. But still quite thin and petite, especially around the shoulders, paired with a long neck and cute small face smattered with freckles. A fleeting thought is that she could probably take him in a fight.

 

She hands him the resume and explains, “I’d like to apply for the opening position.”

“Sure, what’s your name?”

“Kiyoko Shimizu, Sugawara told me about the job.”

“Oh I see! Well, I’ll grab Yaachi to start the interview.” He smiles and absentmindedly ties up his hair as he wanders off to somewhere deeper in the restaurant. 

 

“Yaachi?” He peers into the office confused, he’s 99% sure she was in here a minute ago….It isn’t until he looks down that he sees a blonde ponytail sticking from behind the desk.

 

“Tadashi, there’s a celebrity in our diner.” She whispers crouched behind the desk, her eyes squinting towards the window where Miss.Kiyoko is in sight.

“I don’t think Kiyoko-san is a celebrity…”

“She must be, that or a famous super model.” She pauses thoughtfully before turning toward him with a grim expression, “Do you think her fans will kill me for talking to her?” she whispers worried.

 

“I’m pretty sure if she was a famous super model she wouldn’t be applying as a waitress for minimum wage.”

“It’s a manager position, it’s like 2 dollars more.”

“Right. Either way, I don’t think her fans are going to kill you.”

“I have to interview her? What if I mess up the questions? What if she thinks I look unprofessional? Oh my god I didn’t come dressed for an interview-”

“Yaachi, you’re the one giving the interview, you don’t have to worry.”

“Have you seen her Tadashi? I think I’m going to have a heart attack.”

“C’mon, she’s waiting.” He gently ushers the tiny blonde from her hiding spot to the front where Kiyoko is waiting.

 

“U-uh let’s start the interview!!”

“Right, thank you.”  She nods politely and tuck a loose hair behind her ear. Yaachi takes a moment to stare before shaking her head numbly.

“No, thank you....-for the application! Uhm yeah, let’s go the office..right here.” 

She nervously walks ahead, face already flushed. Kiyoko follows behind, smiling, almost amused.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought of separating this as two chapters but I figure we might as well plow through Kiyoko’s story in one go so we could introduce Noya/Tanaka/Ennoshita and also Yaachi/Yams before next chap. Right now I’m pretty much just laying some groundwork, there’ll definitely be a follow up on Suga’s backstory. I’m really feeling the slow build thing lol Hope you all stick around for more updates!! As always I love feedback, it’s super helpful and encouraging, and I have a special place in my heart for ppl who kudos (u da real MVP)  
> PS: if you notice any errors feel free to tell me!! tbh there was a lot of last minutes edits and I don't trust my 3:30AM proof reading skills :P 
> 
> Hit me up on tumblr, @totally-atooruble

**Author's Note:**

> I've always liked stories that were a little bit twisted. I drew a bit of inspiration from American Psychopath which my friend made me watch lol. I chose Oikawa because I thought it'd be interesting to have a man who seemed completely perfect on the outside, talented, beautiful, confident, intelligent, be actually hiding a dark secret behind his facade. I really hope you keep reading because I already have so many ideas about this AU and much more in depth study on the nature of Iwaizumi and Oikawa's relationship. I hope you leave some feedback because honestly I'm so embarrassed and really curious what you guys think. OuO;
> 
> Oh yeah, I got a Tumblr : @totally-atooruble.tumblr.com !! and the ask box is actually open on this account, took me a million years to realize it was closed on the old one lol message me literally anything I have so much unconditional love for anyone who messages me lol


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